[There is some muttered Italian as Caterina pokes at the hologram screen, not sure how to use it. It's very rude Italian. Not family friendly. Then...]

Ah! Pezzo di merda! Is it working? Obviously something is happening, but I have never seen anything like this before. How... no, that is not important right now.

What is important is that I am told I am here to bring color to this city. Perché? Is the color you have not good enough for you? It looks acceptable to me. And if you are expecting me to thank you for freeing me from the Borgia stronzi, you'll get no such thanks from me. Abduction is abduction, no matter who is doing it.

So then. Who is in charge here and how do I go about explaining this gross misunderstanding to him?


((OOC: I apologize if I murder the Italian language at any point in time. I'm working from Google Translate, I don't know a lick of Italian personally.))

Sora? Riku... I know you're here. If you can hear this, let me know, okay?

[It seems someone has figured out the bracelet's functions very quickly.]

I tried to leave, but it's too foggy... I can't see anything. I was told to go to Sigyn house, but until I can go outside, I think I'm stuck here.

If anyone else is with me here in this castle, I guess we could meet up and keep each other company while the weather's bad? There are a lot of names on this list on the bracelet, so some of you must be here, too, right? My name is Kairi. I don't really understand what's going on here, but until I figure it out... It's nice to meet all of you!

[Hello, Asgard. We interrupt your creepy old man, owl and lion woes to bring you this.... thing. This trolling thing. Vanitas has had a few days to peruse the educational material Euri lent to him--enough time to get to the first sex scene and promptly laugh himself hoarse.

Oh, but this is too good to keep to himself. Way, way, way too good.

It's hard to miss this video of Vanitas sitting calmly in a chair somewhere in Hel's house, one leg crossed casually over the other with a book in his hand. There's an eerie little smile on his face, as he opens it with no lead-in, and starts reading aloud in a very even tone.]

The Treasure or the Trophy, Chapter seven. Page sixty three.

( Cut for NSFW of the trashy romance novel variety )

[He makes it through without a hint of laughter, or flinching. Just dry, and a little amused. Once he gets there, Vanitas abruptly stops, and closes the book.]

So, this is what it's all about? Stupid... How do you guys keep from laughing yourselves to death?

[ The video function initiates! A figure is in plain view, but the background seems to be swerving and moving in a pretty fast pace... At least the main focus isn't moving that abruptly, but she is wearing something pretty ridiculous with a short bow strapped onto her back.

It doesn't help that she's a bit bloodied up. ]

If I knew being a prisoner of war--of should I say "honored guest"--would be so luxurious, I would have surrendered sooner! [ 'cept not, she has a battle to win for other people. ]

Everyone's so calm. It's kind of weird. Anywaaaay, this is a pretty cool amusement park! Though I'm not really into Norse myth or anything, this place is still pretty sweet. Especially when the first thing you see is a maid that tells you everything is basically taken care of.

There is something I would like to ask though... The cute maid was just part of the attraction, right?! There is no way it would be impossible to "go home". [ There has to be an exit! That is what she is looking for, zooming all over the area. Go ahead and stop her in her tracks or throw something at her if you want. ]

Someone give me a sign!! [ NOTHING MAKES SENSE--S-so disoriented here. Help a girl out here? ]

So this is interesting. [Clay peers down at his bracelet curiously, though his tone is dry and his expression one of faint, almost exasperated amusement.] This little side trip definitely wasn't on my list of things to do, but it's nice to be pleasantly surprised for once.

Don't suppose anyone's run into a Desmond, have they?