[ GREETINGS COSPLAYERS. The video starts with 1 heart-eating plant standing outside the castle fresh with his letters in hand and the most excited face ever ]

I can't believe it... My first kidnapping!! This is so exciting--! A new world, and unseen foe...I wonder, is it because Satsuki and I dined-and-dashed?

I've never been kidnapped before! What should I do?? I've only ever heard about this on forums before, but usually that involves lotion and people with knives... Do I get to see one of those too???

Hello Mr. and Mrs. Kidnappers! Nice to meet you, wherever you are...!

I wonder if I should I give them a souvenir? Is that the right custom?

[The video broadcasts a girl who looks preeeetty disoriented, humming tunelessly to herself as she tugs at the brightly colored (and haphazardly cut) strands of her hair]


Hiii. It’s me. Not anyone else.

Just.



Me.


[Her voice is oddly lyrical, it drops and raises intonation in places it shouldn't. Certain syllables are dragged on. She sounds very far-away, dreamy. She waves and gestures to herself grandly, as though expecting applause. Receiving none, she does a little twirl~]



Aaaaaaand. I’m here! Here. But this time I didn’t do it, I didn’t bring myself here. It wasn’t me. It was. Someone else.

It wasn’t my fault.


See. I can do things right too. See! [The girl smiles widely. Obviously this was a huge achievement.]

But um. [She lowers her gaze, voice suddenly somber. Hesitant.]

My doggie. I lost him. Again. And my fish. I don’t have my fish and I can’t make them anymore. I’m going to get lost without them. My fish. And my dog.

Um. [She looks up hopefully, as though expecting the animals to burst out of nowhere.] Do you...do you know. Where they are?

[When the feed first comes on, Castle's just staring at the communicator, a confused look on his face. After he realizes that it's transmitting, he breaks into a smile.]

Ok, seriously, who's on the other end of this thing? Ryan? Espo? I don't know where I am right now, but this is awesome. Is this a belated birthday present from you guys? Please tell me that if I get to be a Norse god, I get to have a costume as well. Where do I pick that up? The woman was really vague... and kind of creepy if I'm being honest with you.

[Castle laughs.]

House Loki. The trickster. Well played, gentlemen. Well played.

Oh and please tell me I get to keep the bracelet, because this is pretty much the most badass technology I've ever seen in my life.

[As he moves outside of the palace, he's able to look around some more and he realizes that thiiiiiiis is not New York City. One can see the mood change on his face. The laughter is a bit more nervous this time.]

T-This is impressive, you guys. Truly. But um.. where exactly am I? There doesn't seem to be a GPS feature on this thing...

<sub>[ If anybody is out there receiving texts, they may get a wall of purple here, not sounding utterly pleased with his sudden new location. He's going to sent an out cry of this before switching to video.
It's a rather demanding sounding wall of text. This guy is really trying to sound dead serious here, but it's sort of hard to take what he's saying seriously, really. ]


[ Impatience as nobody responds right away, Eridan snarls and switches to video. We an exhausted looking fish boy here with disgusting looking fins protruding from his face. His hair is styled in some messy faux hawk with a purple streak in it, eyes framed with stereotypical hipster glasses. Oh, and the stupid scarf of course. It takes him awhile to adjust the video on his face properly, and all he barks is this: ]</sub>

Vvris, if you're out there, get your ASS ovver here! I ain't done wwith this!
As for anybody else, tell me wwhat the HELL is goin' on here! You're addressin' sub-ROYALTY here. I demand you givve me your damn RESPECT.

[ The screen flickers on to a blonde kid with a beanie pulled down so low it almost covers his eyes.  He has an expression that somehow manages to be both incredibly confused and incredibly pleased at the same time.  The feed wiggles around a little, and from the way his arm is positioned just off screen it's pretty clear he's screwing around with moving it the holographic panel. ]

Oh my god this is so awesome... and I thought my cellphone was cool.

[ The feed wiggles again... and then again more rapidly.  Someone apparently is having a little much fun with his new toy.  It abruptly stops and the teen looks almost sheepishly at the screen. ]

Oh crap... that was on wasn't it? Yeah... it was.  I, uh.. sorry to anyone watching that.

[ Kazu is silent for a moment and tugs nervously on his hat for a moment.  It looks like he might just be ready to escape this embarrassment all together and turn his neato bracelet thingermajiger off, but he pipes up again soon after. ]

I guess if anyone is out there this is a good time to ask if this whole thing is for real? That maid kind of explained things but she was... vaguely creepy.