Fire... [They're bristling, their skin seeming to bunch up strangely and shiver all over. Fire. One of the few things that can cause unimaginable pain to the normally invulnerable super-duo.]

If we could, we'd rip the wings right off that beast. [Green-flecked spittle flies from their mouth as they snarl, their teeth seeming larger and more cruel than usual.]

Is anyone hurt? Is anyone stuck inside and can't get themselves out? [No mirth today, just a low, heated growl of sound. They're serious. And, they'd gladly risk their own life if it meant saving others. Nothing else is important right now.]

[ there's certainly been a lot of grumbling about cupcakes recently, and Takane has... words.

... She also has an apron, her hair pulled back into a ponytail, and a mango in her hand that she's concentrating on peeling. Yes, dear audience, she may be addressing you, but the mango has her attention. ]

A solicitous greeting, current inhabitants of this plane. May your expeditions both in the realms of culinary and culture venture forth with favorable results.

[ peeeeeeel. ]

I had hoped you would reach an understanding by your own merit, but I will offer you this thought.

Would you, perhaps, care to ponder what the salvation of a world and the baking of exquisite treats share?

((OOC: Work in fifteen, so tags will come tonight! Also making mango cupcakes, awwyeah. She'll happily welcome taste-testers.))

[Elika's writing diligently in neat but flowing handwriting, her eyes darting back and forth between what she's writing and the broadcast.]

Bear with me, I'm going to talk a lot in a moment. [whatever she was working on, she finishes and closes the notebook.]

So, I'm wondering if anyone would be willing to help me with a census. The names of everyone here, where they come from, what language they speak, what House they're in and with what power... More besides, if we wanted. There's no purpose to it except knowledge and curiosity. If there's anyone actively trying to find a way home, it would be available to them if they wish to look for patterns or whatever. [she waves a hand impatiently] I won't lie and say it's not for my own curiosity as well. I'd like to see what patterns there are, if any - and I wouldn't mind just keep tracking of how many people are here in general and how we've been disbursed among the Houses.

[there's a smirk and a dry tone as she adds:] The biggest problem with a census is tracking those not willing to participate. Though I'm perfectly willing to just have a margin of error and not really worry about it, considering this, again, doesn't have much purpose besides killing a few cats.

Of course, there could be more practical applications - finding out who has any medical or healing knowledge or ability. I know Sigyn has an actual healing power and there's the hospital as well, but I think it would be useful to know if there's anyone nearby in the case of an emergency, so that immediate medical attention can be given until the injured person in question can be moved to the hospital or a Sigyn healer can arrive. Zen has a small clinic set up in the Heimdall House, and I think it might not hurt to have similar setups in the other Houses.

I'll probably also like to make packages of information for easy reference for newcomers, with addendums for those who arrive from special circumstances. [she spreads her hands, a smirk drawing across her features] I definitely would have appreciated one on "electricity" when I arrived, so I figured I should make it a little easier for anyone else like me who didn't have this kind of technology.

I'd appreciate any suggestions or recommendations. Help, too, if you're interested.

[Well, Yukiteru's video is upside down, he doesn't know it's on yet, so he mumbles a bit]

Oh...I wonder if Yuno and me can still--

[A pause as he moves his face closer to his bracelet.]

Ah! Oh, is this on! [His face is slightly pink and he's clearly flustered, he puts the video the right way up now though and smiles a bit.] Um, I'm Amano Yukiteru and if anyone can hear this, will you help me out?

The woman who was here didn't inform me on a lot, I don't really understand what she meant... [Sighs. He supposes he can't ask certain questions here, that'd be a dumb move.] Never mind! Any information about this place would be good then.

I guess though...has anyone seen a girl named Yuno? She's...she shouldn't be so hard to remember, actually I'd be really surprised if she didn't mention me. [Pause.] Also...can you get out of this place, at all? I have some...other things to do back at home.

[When the video feed cuts in, it's to a quietly smug, slightly amused man. He looks to be in his late thirties/early forties, with long black hair and a surprisingly fit body for a man his age. His shirt also seems to refuse to close  properly, buttoned close only a few inches above his navel]

What a surprisingly cute maid. Not much of a talker, though, which is a shame. Nothing makes a later cuter than a warm personality.

[He gives a smirk at the camera, though it's less antagonizing and more friendly than anything] Anyone willing to help out an old man? I'm looking for a blondie named 'Cherry'.

[A pause] He prefers it if you call him 'Charles'.

[Have a harried looking elementary school kid, Asgard. Conan looks severely put upon. His apron is too big and too pink. As if that wasn't enough, he's got a smudge of cupcake batter on one cheek and hasn't quite managed to get all the flour off his shirt.]

... never thought I'd be doing this.

Okay. For anyone confused, Cupcakes. A small cake, usually topped with icing and decorated with any manner of confectionary. In other words, it's a dessert.

First you make the cake part. Second you wait for it to cool and make the icing. Finally, you decorate. Since this is a competition, I probably shouldn't get into too much detail, but there's a couple of things that I think people need to know.

Namely, things that do not usually go in cupcakes -- things like vegetables, animal fat, arsenic. Everyone got that? Good.

ETA: Laundry powder is not for cooking with. In fact, if it's not already in the kitchen, don't put it in your food. And if it is in the kitchen, but you don't recognise it? Ask a responsible housemate.

((ooc: Hel housemates, the arsenic reference is not aimed at anyone in particular (unless you want it to be). I just figured that Hel's kitchen has to have a few suspect bottles floating around and Conan's got to have something to bitch about. So yes, please ignore Conan and merrily poison as many cupcakes as your hearts desire~!

eta: Sorry guys! Notifications are going astray. I hope I haven't left anyone waiting too long, but sorry if I have -- definitely wasn't intentional.))

[Jack is sitting at in an arm chair, slumped a little and looking completely bored. Even living underground in Cardiff had been more exciting than this.]

Is there anything exciting going on beside more people arriving?

[Walking around a dull grey city only does so much for a guy.]

Bored, bored, bored. [Their claws are drumming irritably against the table, their bestial jaws propped up by their other hand.] So we're going to ask you all a question, because we can. Answer or don't! You sass us enough, and we'll hunt you down and yank your spine out through your throat.

[They pause and stare at that, lips curling back so their teeth are even larger and glistening. With that, they burst out laughing.]

Only kidding!

[ The video feed is set on to a female in gothic lolita clothing in a kitchen, an apron over her dress as she whips cream in a bowl. There's a pan of mini, cooling, and empty pie shells in front of her. She sets the bowl down and goes for some fruit from the fridge, coming back over to the counter as she finally starts talking into the feed.]

So, will these powers of ours actually do something besides be used for everyday household tasks... [ she trails off as she presses a hand to the mixing bowl and it instantly frosts within seconds ] ...as well as competitions amongst the houses? Hm~ At least it helps me finish my cold bakery treats faster!

It would be awesome if these powers evolve enough for us to do more with them. [ Then her eyes start sparkling as she clasps her hands in delight. ] Like I could make replica of my swords!

Anyway~ Anyone in the Odin House, feel free to come enjoy some fresh fruit tarts! I think I am overdue for a trip for some tea... [ She takes up her bracelet and cuts off the feed. ]

Alright--this has been bothering me for a while now.

I don't know what the hell kind of messed-up worlds most of you come from--an' I don't really care either--but in what kind of fucked up world is it normal where everyone and their haggy old mom is a freak of nature???

All you people with your rainbow hair and your eyes-on-acid or whatever the fuck you've done to them! You are all freaks. What the hell is wrong with all of you? I mean I'm a fuckin' freak and I still think you guys are freaks! That pretty much makes you all like...three times as fucked up. And you all act like it's normal--! Even when you're wearing a freakin' garden party bonanza for hair or look like you had someone shoot paint into your eyes.

Let me just tell you now: hair the color of the fucking rainbow an' all it's inbred cousins isn't normal.

But does anyone think it's weird?? Nope! You all just show up from J-pan with name likes "Mantaro Yuckimushi" or whatever the fuck they are. "Impossible-to-pronounce-ibamumamu". Anyway, you show up and act like all the freaks with hair and eyes as fucked up as yours are totally normal. Which means you're brain damaged or your world is just as fucked up as you are.

Where I come from? Only old people have white hair. Magical...sparkling, whatever-the-fuck eyes only come on the things that look like people, but who actually just eat other people. Like demons or vampires or...I don't know. Mutant frogs.

So congrats! You guys must have won the fuckin' freak show lottery or something because now you get to live in a city full of people just as messed-up as yourselves! Because when even the non-humans think you guys are freaks, something has gone seriously wrong. And humans were pretty fucking weird to begin with.


...Actually yeah, I guess if you already ain't human then it's a different story. Like if you're one of those Termites or a fairy or goose or whatever...well you're already abnormal so this shit doesn't really matter.


[ ooc; KAZ IS THE WORST AT MULTICULTURALISM I'M SORRY sjkdfgdsjkgsjk i love all animu characters no matter what acid trip their eyes and hair are on I promise ;; also termite = MSPA TROLLS sob ]

[Alright.

He's been keeping to himself for as long as it was possible without actually connecting with this magicked bangle, mostly because he's still very very pissed off over ending up in a mockery of the land he calls home, but there's only so long one can go before the itch of curiosity becomes too much.

So here he is, making a post on the network, every bit of him looking highly unimpressed.]

This whole place being disingenuous and uninspired as it is — permit me to ask, really, but is there any other reason for the snow occurring beyond that it could?

The talking snowmen didn't even attack anyone.

[Secret: the gifts were a nice touch. He's not saying that out loud in fake Asgard, though.]

[When the camera turns on, Rick is sitting cross-legged on a bed, a bulky looking duffel bag next to him, barely touching his leg; he's keeping it in easy-to-get distance.]

Been awhile since I had a long sleep on a soft bed. [He chuckles softly, a little anxiously.] Don't know 'bout e'ryone else, here, but I'm glad not to be sleepin' on this frozen ground.

[He smiles easily into the camera.] Should probably have introduced myself right off the bat, 'stead of goin' into my sleepin' habits. I'm Rick Grimes. Back home, I was a Sheriff's deputy. If you don't know what that is, it's a little like a policeman. And if you don't know what that is... well, it's my duty to enforce the law of the land. I know some of you out there do the same thing, back home. Might be useful to compare notes, if we're goin' to be here for awhile.

[He lets out a soft sigh.] Looks like we might be, too. I guess I don't have much else to say; I've never been much of a talkin' man. Big speeches aren't really my thing.

[Rick pauses, running a hand through his slightly long hair, and then picking up his hat from off camera, putting it on his head.]

I do have a question... anyone know 'bout the ones in charge of this place? It's all... mythology and stuff, right? Never really heard of Heimdall before, so I don't know how they chose how we stay where, and why we're not all roomin' together, as Newcomers. That's all.

[There's a full vase of roses sitting next to Morticia, as though for decorating her room. She's pulling them out, one by one, and methodically clipping the flower from the stem, and then replacing them in the vase, casually rearranging them as she does so.]

It's dim, it's dreary, it's dismal- it's almost truly desolate.

[She snips off another flower.]

But it lacks a certain something. [Snip. A thoughtful look, and then an arched eyebrow.] Perhaps vultures. [Another pause.] No, something bigger. An execution. Just the way to spend an evening, waiting for the blade to fall. Something depressing for the whole family. The children would love it.

[And she sighs, a little dejected, and finishes off the last flower.]

[Hello there, Asgard. Have a troll, laying back on his bed in his room over in Hel house. He's got his pillows and blankets piled against the wall, leaning back against them with his knees bent up and his arms pulled in around his stomach. He's set the bracelet on the nightstand, where it records him looking down at his fingers while he plays with his nails and thinks for a moment. Then he looks up at the recording, taking in a deep breath before he starts.]

Alright, so after explaining what the fuck I am and what I've done for the two-thousand-eight-hundred-and-thirty-sixth time, I think it's time to get a little back from at least the halfway-intelligent of the rest of you.

Basically, I have way too much fucking time on my hands all of a sudden, and I don't know really know what to do with it, so I might as well get a little more involved in the "community" if I have to put up with all of you nooksucking woobie idiots. In short, you can all be reassured that it's out of sheer, mind-numbing boredom that I'm even acknowledging the minuscule amount of curiosity I harbor toward the multitude of universes you've all been unceremoniously ripped from at what I can only assume was the worst moment possible. If you haven't caught on yet, I'll make it perfectly clear what I'm talking about.

I want you to tell me where you're from. Describe to me, in the most intelligent manner possible, what your home world was like. And don't just give me stupid hoofbeastshit stories. I might have copious amounts of time, but not enough for you to waste with grueling dribble about exactly how vaguely "cool" or "awesome" or "boring" your world is. Make it interesting.

[He pauses, making a bit of a face as he realizes something.]

Oh, yeah.

If anyone else from Alternia has gotten here, and we haven't talked yet, we need to, so get a hold of me.

[The feed starts off blinking, before coming into view.  Clearly the wearer hasn't gotten fully used to his braclet yet even though he's been wearing it for a few weeks now. ]
[He grumbles] Is this thing-dammit fine be that way...stupid.  Cheh.

AHEHEHEHEMMMMM.  OI, IF YOU GUYS ARE LISTENING.  I got somethin' to say.  While talkin' about our feelings is great and all.  Has anyone got any real answers?  I mean, we know we're kidnapped, but there's gotta be something more than that. 

I know I'm not the only one whose sick of sitting around all day with nothin' to do, but pick lint off the floor. 

When are we gonna do this spring cleaning that they recruited us for?  I know I sure didn't sign up for this. 

If it comes down to it, I'll go talk to those stupid Gods myself.

[Hello, Asgard. You didn't think Szayel would lay low forever, did you? Your resident smug asshole pink scientist appears on your wrist communicators today with a little... PSA? Rather tame for him, isn't it?]

Greetings, my fellow Newcomers. I am Szayel Aporro Granz, and I am speaking to you today to offer my services.

[Feel blessed. After all, how often does perfection offer to help you?]

Considering the state of the weather and how fragile human bodies are, I would be more than willing to assist anyone that finds themselves injured and unable to get to the hospital. While I am not specifically a healer, I have some skill with mending broken bones.

[And, you know, maybe taking an organ or two while you're in his care. Nothing you'll miss too terribly.]

Do not hesitate to call should you need it. I will always respond.

[...yep, totally trustworthy guy here. This smile of his is totally and completely sane.]

[Jack is sitting in a chair with his feet propped up on the desk. He’s been fiddling with his new communication device all day, a grin on his face as he absentmindedly runs his fingers over the metal band.]

Greetings! Jack Harkness, at your service. With the influx of posts to the network, it's pretty likely this'll get buried in with the rest, but I thought it was about time I’d introduce myself. Get to know the locals and all that.

[He flashes a winning smile, throwing in a wink for added charm. Ending up unexpected places is a bit of a bad habit of Jack’s, so he’s far from surprised at the change in scenery. Add on the fact that he hadn’t had any plans back home and you’ve got a surprisingly happy camper.]

Gotta say, this comm device is amazing. After being stuck in the twenty-first century for so long, it’s refreshing to see something so simple yet sophisticated. Kudos to the creators.

[His tone takes a turn for the serious, though there’s still a smile on his lips. Upon closer inspection, though, it doesn’t quite reach his eyes.]

As much as I love a new planet and cool technology, I’ve never been a big fan of kidnapping. I was told something about this place needing help, but usually people ask for that instead of just snatching someone out of their bed. If anyone knows anything, give me a ring. I've attempted to sift through the network, but like I said, it's flooded with posts at the moment.

[With another more genuine smile and a casual salute, the feed ends.]