[With all the recent fuss centering around a certain deadman, it's bound to happen that a third party will interfere. Too bad that third party is Hazama.]

It has come to my attention that while we have a balanced ratio of men to women, some people are not just satisfied! First, it was assumed this person may have undergone some trauma that made him so, how can I put this delicately? Ah yes, sensitive to women in general.

He denied that right off the bat.

Next, others guessed he swung the other way! That ended spectacularly, as his denial became bigger than any ocean. And since I'm all out of ideas, all I'm asking from the wonderful people of this city is if you know some...other solutions to his problem. [He's not pointing out to this conversation whatsoever, nope.] If you do find one, please direct it a Kiyomasa Senji! I'm sure he'll appreciate your assistance.

...oh? His name should have been left out? Whoops.

[oh, it looks like another part of a video got added right after-]

And apparently he likes horses! It takes all kinds, I suppose. Any takers?

[Or as much of an "apology" as you're gonna get from this girl, Senji. Brace yourself this is going public.]

Alright, so apparently an old buddy of mine thinks I'm trying to ruin his life or somethin'--but he's got that all wrong. It's just a friend tryin' to help another friend out, right? Not like I'm spreading total bullshit about him or giving him a bad name.

...But I guess I jumped the gun on assuming something here. I always thought he was just shy around girls 'cause he was some giant prude, but....well....I've gotta correct myself on that.

[And she's reluctant to admit it. Or is she?]

Didn't know you swung the other way, Crow. My bad.

[And have an almost apologetic (but more of a smirk than anything) smile here before the feed ends.]

((ooc: SHE IS IN HEL IF ANYONE WANTS ACTION OR TO SEE THIS IN PERSON BTW))

[He's mad. He's so mad.]

Oi! Oi oi! If you see a little shit named Minatsuki Takami don't talk to her, and don't listen to the shit she's been spreadin' about me!

She's tellin' people I'm an old, friendless loser and a........ virgin. [by the way he mumbles that it's almost obvious but--] She's just a big liar, alright?!

[After a moment's pause and some muttered complaints, a boy's voice begins to ring out.]

If this ridiculous joke doesn't end soon-- Wait, is it working now? Excuse me, my name is Earl Ciel Phantomhive, head of the Funtom Company and the Phantomhive estate. I am not sure what pretenses I was brought here under, but I would like to take my leave as promptly as possible. If anyone could tell me how I can best accomplish that, I would be very grateful. The… woman who greeted me was unable to provide me with satisfactory information. Thank you for your time.

[It seems like his message is complete, but the audio feed carries on, something he is clearly not aware of.]

Begging strangers for help, how humiliating. This whole situation makes no sense! And where is Sebastian? How could he be so stupid and incompetent as to let this happen? More importantly, I now have to deal with this insufferable place on my own. Hopefully not everyone in this place is like that bizarre woman.

-king? My, how technology never fails to live up to expectations.

[The feed crackles for a second, then two, before a man tapping the bracelet on his wrist appears on the screen. It takes him a few more seconds to notice the thing work, and even then, he gives a wave. The man in question is smiling, even if it somehow feels a little off.]

Ah, yes, hello. Would anyone mind telling me what the situation at hand is? I was just enjoying my breakfast before finding myself here. [He flourishes his hand in the feed, as if emphasizing his point.] And if someone were to direct me to the nearest cafe, that would be greatly appreciated.

[There’s nothing unusual about the man, nothing at all. He seems to be waiting for something, anyhow.]

[The feed snaps on to show a girl, seemingly no older than twelve, seated at a cafe in the Odin district with a cup of tea and saucer in her hands. She takes a short sip from her cup, and places it onto the saucer with a dainty click. After a small sigh, she glaces up at the recording holographic screen, her red eyes carrying depths of boredom.]

... I tire of this place. Really, having the nerve to send me here without my servants to accompany me... It's quite vexing. I much loathe to frequently make arduous treks to this cafe, all just to enjoy a cup of tea. Even the high quality of these blends makes little consolation.

[She places the teacup and saucer onto the table, the same place her bracelet sits on, and rests an elbow onto the chair's arm, her pale cheek leaning lightly against the knuckles of her hand.]

I suppose I shall introduce myself. I am Rachel. For those who enjoy injudiciously holding attention to irrelevant matters, I am the head of the Alucard family. You may address me as 'Master,' 'Your Worship,' or 'Mistress,' if you are feeling... courageous. Don't bother explaining things to me, for I am already aware of them.

[What. The little girl is surprisingly verbose... and bitchy.]

Now then, moving on to the purpose of this broadcast... I understand that my finances have failed to follow me here as well, which proves to be quite the inconvenience. However, I am not made for coarse work, therefore... You will answer my inquiry: Are there any educational establishments in this dismal city? I find it fitting for someone of my caliber to instruct, or at the very best take over as headmistress. [A small smirk appears on her lips as she lets out a chuckle.] Oh yes, the idea very delightful indeed....

[Yes, if she must earn money, she might as well find an occupation that gives her authority. Her smile quickly drops back to her usual disdainful expression.]

... Though if there aren't any schools, it certainly would explain the mindlessness of these... people... if one could refer to them as such.

[action]

[Anyone passing through Odin District may notice this prosecutor conversing with a very familiar snowman near the library. His arms are crossed, and he taps his right upper arm with his left index finger as he waits patiently for this winter visitor to speak. He's a little relaxed...although some tension remains. Because seriously HE'S TALKING TO A SNOWMAN ASGARD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE NOW. Sure, Miles has gotten sort of used to how things roll here, but nothing prepared him for TALKING SNOWMEN. WHAT WERE THESE GODS PLAYING AT.

The snowman's button mouth moves, and he finally gives his riddle.]

I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation, and I surround every place. What am I?

[A moment is all Miles needs to answer this one. His neutral expression changes into a smirk. This riddle was child's play compared to the contradictions he had to unearth from difficult witnesses' testimonies. His tone is very sure...possibly even smug. Silly snowman, you don't know 'bout his shiny logic.]

The letter e, of course.

That's right. [The snowman hands him a wrapped present; his coal eyes seem to twinkle with approval. Miles looks at the present for while, then slowly reaches out to take it.]

Ah...thank you. [He stares down at the gift, wondering what could be inside - or if this was yet another trick by the gods.]

[video]

[Several minutes later, he will make his very first post on the network. Miles has spoken to a few people - mostly from his House - but he has spent much of the past week investigating as much of Asgard as he can, trying to find anything that would unravel this setup. He has found nothing, and as all his theories fall away one by one, he slowly realizes that everything, from the gods spiriting them to Asgard to the gifts these gods supposedly granted their visitors, was real. With no evidence to debunk the existence of this strange realm, his arguments were going nowhere.

So ladies and gentlemen, he will be seated at the table in his room, with a stack of books, his organizer and this hat - albeit black with an equally dark satin ribbon. At first glance it doesn't seem so warm, no? But hey, it's a nice hat. And it's winter.]

The snowman I met in my district tested my wits with a riddle, and rewarded me for my answer. [He gestures toward the hat.] I can only assume that snowmen in other districts would test others differently. [He didn't leave Odin District after he got his riddle and his hat.]

If you have met a snowman in another district besides that of Odin, what task were you given, and did you complete it?

[ The video feed comes on, but Rika doesn't quite address everyone just yet. It looks like she's taking a moment to move some windows around on her touch screen. There's a troubled expression on her face for a few seconds, seeming like she's struggling. This sort of technology is something she isn't used to. She didn't even own a computer back home. But even if she did, they weren't that advanced.

Finally, she looks into the screen and gives a polite bow of her head in greeting. She has been roaming around outside in the Freya district. ]

Good morning, Asgard.

I'm searching for a few friends of mine. Their names are Furude Hanyuu and Houjou Satoko. [ Actually, there's more than those two... but they were the two standing closest two her at the time. ]

They're both about the same age as me. [ So, probably about nine or ten-years-old? ] If you meet them, please tell them that Furude Rika is waiting for them at the Freya House. We usually stick together like glue.

Thank you very much. [ Then she flashes a big smile. ] Nipa~☆

[ A pause. There was something else she wanted to ask before she shut off the feed. ]

Mii. Has anyone else encountered a talking snowman? It asked me for a kiss.

...I think it was more like a snowwoman than snowman.