Voice; 2

[tonsofpun]

Okay, time to lighten the mood.

[Because after all this shit that's happened, she needs to smile. She needs something, anything, to take her mind off all of this and for a second, remember that being alive is good, and right.

And maybe to remember a simpler time.]

I've got this book of puns, right? Well, back in the day, it kinda used to be my thing. And I figure you guys could use this. Or groan, whatever.

Here goes.

A clown held the door open for me the other day.
I thought it was a nice jester.

The butcher backed up into the meat grinder.
He got a little behind in his work.

Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring.
The doctor says I'm okay, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

Pffft.

The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

[That one actually makes her laugh out loud.]

Comments

1/4

[digophelia]

[Wait.


What. How do you back up in a meat grinder? How messy is that? Oh, no, there's all sorts of images Alice in her head. Oh, god, why.]

[digophelia]

[Alice, you think too literally sometimes.]

A meat grinder?

Voice;

[littlesurvivor]

[Okay, Clementine can't help but laugh at these. Really, Ellie. But it does do the job in cheering her a little in spite of. Everything lately.]

I'm sure he's really seasoned after that, yeah. Good to see some things never change.

Voice;

[tonsofpun]

[Ellie adopts a serious voice.]

I relish the fact that you've mustard the strength to ketchup with me.

[tumbler]

You know, I used to know many of these, but none of them translate out of Antivan. It is a shame, truly.

[tonsofpun]

Ahhh, the accent you have, that's Antivan?

[voice]

[snowstormed]

[There's a theatrical, overexaggerated groan on Bucky's end.]

You know, those aren't as punny as you think. [Two can play at this game, little lady.]

[voice]

[tonsofpun]

[Ohh, that's a groaner.]

All right, bud, fire away. You've got something better?

voice;

[cons]

Oh my god.

[ but she's laughing, at least, so there's that ]

I've only got one pun in my arsenal and I'm probably going to mess it up, but-

A steak pun is a - [ a little slower now, not to try and make it funnier, but to make sure she's saying it right] - rare medium well done.

voice;

[tonsofpun]

[And Ellie busts a gut laughing.]

I've heard that one before, but it's a great one.

[Video]

[madcuriosity]

OH! Oh I love puns! Can I try a few on you, Miss Ellie?

[Video]

[tonsofpun]

For sure.

[She backs up, grinning in surprise.]

Go ahead, Alice. Hit me.

Video

[izanyagi]

[Someone is laughing loudly and clapping.]

Those are great! I have to remember them for later.

Video

[tonsofpun]

You like puns?

Oh man, have you got any?

video

[bythewaves]

[ Maglor is pleased to see Ellie looking better but... he doesn't get it? Have a very confused stare ]

I fear there may be issues with translation there, Ellie [ wry ]. I am glad to see you well, however [ or, well better, at any rate ]

video

[tonsofpun]

Yeah, maybe.

[She's still chuckling, though.]

-not gonna lie, Maglor, stuff's still kinda fucked up around here. But that's what this is for, right?

permavideo;

[sufferably]

You could stage a whole performance around puns.

But in the end it'd be just a play on words.

( his humor usually runs a little dryer, but children are an exception to at least 99% of his rules. )

permavideo;

[tonsofpun]

[The first part throws her off, before she realizes it's- oh man, even the adults are getting in on it. She cracks up, hard. It feels good.]

That's -- shit, that's a good one.

voice

[windbreak]

That's called lightening the mood? Sounds more like you're just punishing everyone.

voice

[tonsofpun]

[f;slkfdja hahahaha oh fuck. That gets her laughing pretty hard.]

video;

[whitechocolate]

Where'd you get that book? It sounds awesome if the samples are anything to go by.

video;

[tonsofpun]

It's from back in the day, in my world. It was a present.

So far I haven't found any this good in the book shops here.

voice;

[grimmig]

I heard the scarecrow got promoted because he's outstanding in his field.

voice;

[tonsofpun]

[Groooan.]

Oh man, I've heard that one too!

[Video]

[5thchild]

[ blink.

Headtilt.

Blink.






...what. ]

[Video]

[tonsofpun]

They're stupid jokes, Kaworu.

Y'know, to laugh at.

[video]

[quantumtangled]

[One more utterly confused face.]

Is this a means of entertainment?

[video]

[tonsofpun]

It's a means of laughing at the stupidest stuff you can think of, yeah.

[She loves them shamelessly.]

[becauseichooseto]

Hear the one about the three deers?

[tonsofpun]

Nooo?

Go on, go on. Three deers.

[text]

[proudofwhatiam]

[Evy finds all of them quite funny and is going to say so--and then Ellie breaks out the last one. It's been less than a decade from the end of the Great War for her, and while she'd hardly call herself a conscientious objector (for one thing, she was never in danger of being conscripted), it hardly seemed like a 'good war' to her by Armistice Day.

Tl;dr: she's tempted to find some Wilfred Owen for the girl.]

I'm afraid the last one is in rather poor taste; the men who were poisoned by mustard gas suffered horrible fates whether they lived or died.

[text]

[tonsofpun]

[Ellie's face falls a little as she reads it. Well, fuck. They straight-up never had the supplies to process stuff like pepper spray and mustard gas, at least by the time Ellie came into the world.

But she knows. She wouldn't want to joke around about a couple of subjects, either.]

sorry about that

didn't know

video.

[espouses]

[ And here is a Hawke, grinning like a little shit. ]

I suppose you could say you were puntiful, hm?

video.

[tonsofpun]

Are you a carpenter? Because you nailed it.

[Okay, that one is stupid bad.]

[emulation]

Dude, those are awful.

[tonsofpun]

[Ellie just throws out her hands, beaming.]

That's the whole point!

voice

[hedoesntrow]

I knew a guy who used to be a banker. He quit because he lost interest.

voice

[tonsofpun]

... a wha?

[Sorry Booker, that one doesn't translate.]

Voice

[thatrabbitsdynamite]

[Good job, Ellie, you got the rabbit to laugh.]

Okay, fair cop, those were pretty good.

Voice

[tonsofpun]

You got any, Mr. Easter?

[She's still giggling just a little bit. Who knew so many people would take her up on this? Usually her jokes are met with dry groans.]

[Video]

[comeonthensexy]

[ Ellie, you are his new favourite. Laughing. ]

I have to get a look at that book!

[Video]

[tonsofpun]

You're gonna love it. I've got two of 'em.

[Voice]

[hadbadays]

[ Oh no. Oh no, those are so bad.

He's not laughing. Not at all. And his voice is definitely not strained from trying not to. Especially the last one. ]

I guess I know what I'm getting you next Christmas, if we're still here.

[Voice]

[tonsofpun]

Well, my birthday is like-

[She pauses, a thumb in the air, points it around in different directions.]

How do we do time here again? Jade was saying the seasons are super short.

text;

[standsonhigh]

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

[So original. So classy.]

text;

[tonsofpun]

[.... TOO SOON.]

noooooope

video;

[drinkupmehearties]

[ Oh yes. This is much needed, after all the insanity that had just happened. ]

Oh! I've got one!

[ He leans forward in the feed, a finger lifted, because obviously this is going to be awesome. ] Why did the admiral decide against buying himself a new hat?




[ ... ]





He was afraid of cap sizing.

video;

[tonsofpun]

[Jaaaack. Jack, no. She's cracking up.]

Oh, oh, I got one, I got one for you-

What's a pirate's favorite letter?

video.

[firstbeliever]

[He can't help but laugh.]

Those are funny, Ellie.

video.

[tonsofpun]

You got any, squirt?