[ oo3 ∞ anon mass text ]

[thoughts]

ATTENTION ALL CITIZENS AND TRAVELLERS

A reminder that curfew is in effect between the hours of 10:00PM and 6:00AM. All outdoors activities during these hours are strictly prohibited, including but not limited to:

• fornication on rooftops.

Please be mindful of the time when playing hide the snake in public spaces.

This has been a courtesy reminder from your loyal City Patrol: keeping an eye on the sky so that you don't have to.

[ ooc; river will be staying anon unless otherwise noted. feel free to threadjack at will! and for the record, this is totally canon. ]

Comments

[video]

[felttheburn]

Fucked my record, too. Try it again and I'll drop you like rocks.

[thoughts]

It's okay. It's still a good record if you ignore the stains.

[ you know. the dirty filthy sex stains. ]

anon text

[daistanbul]

so are you going to break them up in the middle of it the instant it hits 10pm or are you going to let them finish

[thoughts]

We'll count to ten.

[ ten seconds? ten thrusts? it is a mystery. ]

Audio

[samantha_grey]

... Seriously? Well, stress relief in the trenches I guess.

[thoughts]

It's still stress. There's tension to consider, and a precarious balancing act. It's not ideal.

text;

[bloodypocket]

Is the problem so prevalent it needed a reminder?

[thoughts]

One time is too many times.

[Audio]

[sings_of_death]

Next time send an invite. Not too much more to do around this dump.

[thoughts]

Don't think it was an open party. They bailed with the police arrived.

voice;

[littlesurvivor]

Fornification? Like. Kissing stuff?

[...Ew. But then. Jane and Luke were, back home. Clementine herself is just too young to think about that sort of thing yet.]

[thoughts]

Complicated kissing stuff. It's a dirty business.

[ dirty in a million different ways. namely: bird poop on the roof. ]

[text]

[damselled]

... What?!

[thoughts]

A couple was caught fornicating on the roof after curfew last night.

[ that's what she's perplexed about, right? ]

[also anon]

[averagemedium]

what, going onto the roof counts too?

there go my plans for the night.

[thoughts]

You have our sincerest apologies. Please take your sex elsewhere.

[Perma-video]

[faceofbeau]

Right, so 'Hide the Snake' is off limits on the roof. Damn. What about 'Naked Hide & Seek?' Roofs make for good hiding places.

[He might have a serious stake in the answer, considering the roof is one of his favorite places to go to brood think, but like hell he's going to let that show. Besides, this is more entertaining.]

[Perma-video]

[justacough]

Naked Hide and seek? A man after my own heart.

[justacough]

Such a spoilsport. Sometimes there's nothing quite as exciting as screaming someones name in passion to the literal heavens.

[thoughts]

Heaven is closed for the evening, please try again during business hours of 6:00AM to 10:00PM.

text;

[tonsofpun]

looooool
so daylight hours are ok huh

[thoughts]

Yes. Also guarantees better visibility.

permanon;

[blackhand]

Not sure whether I should be gagging or somehow finding amusement in this.

[Gross. He's so glad he wasn't the one running into the couple responsible for it.]

[thoughts]

Both are appropriate. It wasn't the best thing to read first on my shift.

[video]

[familyissues]

So much anger and frustration over a couple getting some sweet, sweet lovin'.

[thoughts]

No one is angry or frustrated or sweet either. Kind of sticky and maybe alarmed all around, but otherwise just a little put-upon.

video

[fire_punk]

Forni-what? And what's hide the snake?

[thoughts]

fornication: noun

1. voluntary sexual intercourse between two unmarried persons.
2. consensual sexual intercourse between two persons not married to each other.

hide the snake: noun

• idiomatic; see: ғᴏʀɴɪᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ.

[video]

[stilledsurgeon]

Now why hadn't I thought of that?

Any ladies interested in finding out what's so fun about a bit of whoopie on a roof?

[Video]

[justacough]

I already know what's fun about it, darling.

[Video]

[okamichild]

What's fornication?

[thoughts]

see: above

[text]

[snowstormed]

huh

[Well, he'll just scrap any plans he had of rooftop jumping, apparently people are fucking on rooftops now. Not that he sees anything wrong with that.]

should probably keep the rooftop sex to daylight hours and remote locations

[thoughts]

[ dammit, bucky. ]

Smart man. Have smart sex.

[omittance]

jesus

[thoughts]

He's not available at the moment. Can I take a message?

[video]

[bythewaves]

[ Quiet amusement ]

Did you surprise a few folk, little hawk?

[ permanon text ]

[thoughts]

[ maglor no. ]

No hawks here. Just law-abiding folk attempting to maintain order and peace and fewer nighttime scandals.

[text]

[snugglesjugs]

Why would anyone want to do that on a roof? There is dead bugs and bird poo up there. It could get into places...

I guess the gods prohibiting that for health reasons.

[thoughts]

Health and sex education courses might be advised. Bird poop has no place in the bedroom.

anon;

[feathery]

so how long does it take to tell if the public shaming actually works

[thoughts]

It's incalculable. Optimism would put it at less than twenty-four hours but realism suggests the end of days.

Text

[cyan_maid]

...Do I want to know the who, where, and when?
I don't think I want to know, but the who might be important to keep an eye out for...
I don't know, a repeat performance??

[thoughts]

Our man could only provide a rough description. Be on alert for anyone fast and highly acrobatic. I suspect wayward sex clowns.

anon text

[abhero]

pics or it didn't happen

[thoughts]

No pictures have been provided. We could have a Telepath analyze the mental scarring for verification.

voice;

[afrozendance]

What can I say, it sounds... unsafe.

[Yes, just unsafe. Try not to think of the other implications.]

... But nobody was actually hurt, I suppose?

[thoughts]

Depends on the definition of "hurt". There are grievances to air.

fail!private text;

[writeswrongs]

Damn, Kate, why didn't we try this?

[thoughts]

Would you be willing to come in for questioning?