Video - Day 412

[snowcrow]

[Welcome to Jon's face. It's not a particularly happy face. In fact, it looks pretty sour at the moment. He really hates having to use the bracelet, but he has a very important announcement to make.]

This is a message to the gods that have stolen us and brought us here.

[He has no actual knowledge of who the gods are or if they even care about their charges, but as they seem to have more of a hand in the affairs of others than his own gods, he'll see if a direct approach works.]

During the... incident which had your blasted magic working ill against those you gave it to, my brother wound up losing his hand. Due to your ineptitude and this unwanted sorcery, he has a stump where a perfectly fine hand was before. What sort of gods give people powers they don't ask for? It's bad enough you've brought children here, but you seem not to care about the ill effects of your war on those that are hale enough here to fight it.

[The sour look is directed more intensely at the screen now.]

I insist you fix it. I've gone to your temples and asked for this, but as it's seemed to fall on deaf ears, perhaps you need it shouted in your face.

Fix my brother or you'll have me to deal with and Asgard's gods will join him in missing body parts.

[Caw caw, motherfucker.]

Comments

[asgardstricks]

I'm one of those gods you're wasting your time threatening, dumbass. And apparently I'm the only one willing to tell you how to fix this little problem of yours. If I wanted jesting, I'd say you aren't handling this situation very well.

[snowcrow]

[Flat look.]

You don't look like much of a god.

[He barely looked out of boyhood, to be honest.]

Forgive me if I'm leery. I've had jests made of my brother's wound since making this message. My patience is thin. If you say you know a way to cure him, tell me of it.

[asgardstricks]

[ Internally judging your everything, Jon Snow. You really so know nothing.

Instead of being snarky, though, he says very simply, no smile or laughter in his voice: ]

Kill him.

[snowcrow]

This is a jest. I've been told death does not remain so here, but why would I kill him to heal him?

[asgardstricks]

We can fix you when you're dead. Not so much when you're still squirming.

[snowcrow]

You're telling me the only way to make him whole again is to kill him?

[Loki... this place sucked.]

[asgardstricks]

Yup!

[ Yup. ]

[snowcrow]

And I'm to just take your word for it?

[asgardstricks]

Hey, you wanted answers, and I'm giving it to you. Take it or leave it.

[snowcrow]

I'll... take it under advice.

[And ask around to everyone in the city about it.]

[asgardstricks]

Sure. Tell the others too, like that old guy with the stick so far up his ass, it might count as a third leg. He can get his hand back too.

[snowcrow]

... Which man is this?

[Which is asked more out of curiosity than anything.]

[asgardstricks]

The one telling you we don't give a shit about you guys. Which, by the way, is complete bullshit. I wouldn't waste my time keeping you alive if I didn't give a shit. Goes right back to the stick and his ass.

[voice]

[needsnoheadsman]

I've died enough times already.

[Usually, Robb would filter this. Usually, he'd keep his mouth shut about how many times, exactly, has he died. Usually.

But right now he's just tired, a little angry and completely done with Asgard, and so he forgets to put a filter down on this before he sends it off, at least until it's already done.

Whoops.]

[snowcrow]

Once is enough, Robb Stark. Are you implying there's been more than one time? Here?

[voice; private]

[needsnoheadsman]

[well shit.

There's a long pause, during which he debates telling him, then sighs, and this time remembers to put a private filter on his response.]

...aye. [Don't kill him. Again.]

[snowcrow]

So it's true that death here is not permanent? That the 'god' could be right and you could be whole from it?

[Don't think you're off the hook yet, Robb. He'll get to those later.]

[needsnoheadsman]

Death here isn't permanent, no, but I wouldn't know. Even if what he says is true, it isn't something I'd want to try.

[snowcrow]

Perhaps we should ask around. See if there are others who have... had injuries of this kind and if they were set to rights afterward.

[Don't knock it, Robb.]

[voice]

[asgardstricks]

Lots of people have died lots of times. And this war ain't over yet, kid.

[voice]

[needsnoheadsman]

I'm aware of that. [A pause, then, somewhat belatedly and with some reluctance:] My lord. But I would rather not die because you told my brother to kill me so I could get my hand back. I'll not lay that on him, no matter how much I'd want it back.

[voice]

[asgardstricks]

Whatever you want, that's on you. I'm giving you the tools, I'm not forcing you to use 'em. Otherwise I'd just do it myself.

[ See how he is very kindly not killing you again, Robb? What a bro. ]

[tigers]

Brilliant. I quite agree. This is hands down the most humane way to put the poor sod out of his misery.

[asgardstricks]

Dude. Mocking a family's suffering is not cool. You should really get a grip.

[tigers]

You're quite right, chummy. Where have my manners gone? We ought to take this all with a pinch of seriousness.