uno | audio

[tumbler]

[The sound of a busy city square comes through first, with a bustling crowd muffled in the background. If you listen closely, you can hear someone... singing?]

[And he told our poor minstrel to leave or be hit, / before climbing a wall, the rude little-- oof-]

[That over with, a new voice, far less muffled and with an entirely different accent comes on the line:] Ah, if you fine citizens would indulge me so, I do wonder: what do you know of elves?

Comments

audio

[justonetouch]

Like Santa's elves?

[tumbler]

Does this Santa own many elves?

[justonetouch]

Ah'm not sure. They say he has enough to make toys?

[tumbler]

And you have met these toy-making elves?

text

[proudofwhatiam]

Fairy stories.

audio.

[tumbler]

Would you care to elaborate?

[proudofwhatiam]

Those are what I know of elves.

[tumbler]

Which would be infinitely helpful, my dear friend, I assure you, if only I knew anything at all of these 'fairy stories' of which you speak.

[Voice]

[tonsofpun]

Elves. Like the little guys at the north pole kind of elves, or the magical dudes who live with nature and live forever kind of elves?

[tumbler]

[...] Let us focus on the living with nature sort of elves for now, eh?

[tonsofpun]

Why elves?

[tumbler]

Ah, is that the game we are playing, now? Answer a question with a question?

[voice]

[averagemedium]

I don't think we actually had any, where I'm from, just-- stories of them, you know? Lots of different kinds, too. The standard nature-loving forest sort, ones that live underground in the dark, ones with enormous cities and a lot of complicated politics... and then whether any of those types are magical varies between stories, too. Sometimes they just... live a really long time and talk to trees, I guess.

Do they exist where you're from, or are you just looking for any?

[tumbler]

Then I wonder who does the laundry? Serves food? Answers the door? That sort of work.

Perhaps both.

[averagemedium]

I'm not sure the tales usually go into that sort of detail. --well, depending on the author, anyway, some do bother-- but for the most part that's just kind of the stereotype, yeah?

What sort are you familiar with?

[tumbler]

Then, in your, ah, world, these tasks, who accomplishes them?

None of the types you've described, I am afraid.

[Video]

[comeonthensexy]

A whole lot, if fiction and stories can be relied on.

[ But is this an actual elf? Could it be? ]

[tumbler]

But it is just, as you say, 'fairy stories'?

[comeonthensexy]

That would be the question right now, wouldn't it? Could go either way.

[Voice]

[hadbadays]

I know a few things.

[ And because this is Asgard, it's best to add: ]

All made up. Why?

[tumbler]

I have, let us say, a personal interest in the subject.

[hadbadays]

Right. Any particular reason?

[Audio]

[burn_all_the_babies]

[Totally ignoring the actual question..]

I ain't never heard a accent like dat in alllllllll of Pandora! Hmm..

Ya got a kinda Sir Hammerlock way of phrrrrasing ya words.

[Tina rolled her R's, talking in her ' dressy' voice.]

But ya got dis sexy kinda masked badass sound goin' on. Pleasetellmeyourideahorse&kickasses!? Pleasetellmeyourideahorse&kickasses!?

[tumbler]

I do not ride a horse.

[burn_all_the_babies]

Does... Does the horse ride you then?

[She's just a kid, acting like a kid.]