asgardeventide | first at-bat [video]

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first at-bat [video]

[ as the video turns on, you're treated to the sight of a confused looking young man. something that must surely be a familiar sight to anyone who's been here for a protracted period of time... though this one seems perhaps a bit more dazed than most. ]

Ah... hello, everyone.

[ despite his confusion, he manages a weak smile. his voice sounds rather calm, all things considered. ]

Let's see... I'm supposed to introduce myself, right? My name is Satoshi Houjou. It's nice to meet you at all.

Um... what else was there? Sorry, this has never happened to me before so I'm not really sure what to say. If you have any questions, I'd be happy to answer them. Or am I one who's supposed to be asking questions right now? Hm... Can anyone give me some advice? Introductions sure are difficult. I'll do my best to pay you back when I can.

Oh! But we're saving the world, aren't we? Ha... that sounds pretty hard. I've never saved a world before, either. Well, I'll do my best.

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Mmm... our parents passed away a few years ago.

[ he won't bother saying anything about their foster parents... ]

Oh, Satoshi... I'm so sorry. [Her face works as she tries to stay calm for him, since he's being so admirably strong in talking about it.] I - I actually had a friend who had to raise his three siblings, because his mom was dead and his dad ran out on them. You must be really strong, like him.

I wouldn't call myself strong. [ anything but that, in fact. ] I just had to do my best for my little sister. It might have been tough at times, but it wasn't all bad. [ mostly bad, but not all bad. ] It might have been easier the village wasn't... [ oh, wait, no. ] Ah, never mind. Sorry, I'm probably troubling you now.

The strongest people always say that. [A sad smile.]

It's - it's okay. I've heard a lot, and I've been through a lot. If you want to share, you can... it's up to you.

It's not a big deal. Aha... the people in the village just didn't like my family very much. I guess that made things a little harder...

Really?

[She doesn't mean to look excited, she honestly doesn't, but it's her first and most honest reaction. Once she realizes it, she blushes.]

I'm sorry. It's just - my mom and I went through the same thing. She had two friends in the whole town, and I had none. It's... it's terrible to know that other people went through the same thing, but it's also - kind of a comfort? That's awful, I know, but I can't help it. I used to think we were the only person in the world who were so hated.

I'm really sorry, though. No one should have to live like that.

So you had to go through something like that too... I'm sorry.

[ it's a bit of a downer to be reminded, even if he's always done his best to ignore it. he'd had friends... sort of. just friends he'd always had to keep at an arm's distance. in the end, the only person he was truly close to was his sister, and that was mostly because he had to protect her. ]

But I think I understand what you mean. When things are like that, you always feel like you're alone. That there's no one you can turn to. [ a pause. ] So I guess we can sort of understand each other then.

I guess so. [She smiles shyly.] Don't worry, you'll make lots of friends here. People aren't as judgmental here... even the ones I've told about things back home still like me. It's not like a small town or village at all.

That's true. I've already noticed the people here are pretty different. [ pause. ] Maybe a little strange, but in a good way.

One of my friends had a theory that the gods chose mainly outcasts, people who were different or disliked in their worlds, so that they'd bond better here. It doesn't fit everyone, not at all, but it's unusually common for such a diverse group of people.

Oh... I guess that would make sense, wouldn't it? [ though if they want them to socialize, wouldn't it work better if they just brought people that were good at it...?

regardless, he nods. ] If that's what this is about... then I'll do my best. I've always wanted something like a fresh start.

[A fresh start. She grins. They really do have a lot in common.]

Yeah, me too. I used to daydream about going to university in a different city, someplace where no one knew me. This is... different, but it's still - a fresh start, like you said.

This is a little embarrassing, so don't tell anyone... but I used to think about saving up money so I could just go somewhere far away.

It never really worked out though. Haha... it was a pretty dumb idea.

I don't think it's embarrassing or dumb at all. Of course you'd want to escape if people were treating you badly. I probably would've thought of the same, but I couldn't leave my mom behind... and I guess your sister was what kept you, huh?

There was no way I could leave her behind.

You're strong. And... good. [Her smile is tender, overly familiar for a first meeting. But after all they've talked about, she feels like she knows him well enough to share that smile.]

You think so? Thanks. [ he's not sure he entirely believes it himself, but he won't argue with her. ] You've been through a lot too... You're pretty strong yourself.

[Little does he know how much. But she just grins and blushes deeply.]

I just always try to do what's right. It may not make you a lot of friends sometimes, but it means that you can look at yourself in the mirror and know who you are. You know?

What's "right," huh? I wonder if I'm really that strong.

[ he knows quite well that he's done plenty of wrong things in his time... ]

I just do what I think is for the best at the time... even if it turns out to be a mistake in the end.

I think it's the same thing, really. [Her grey eyes darken a little.] No one can know exactly what's right... you just have to go with what your heart tells you. And everyone will make mistakes sometimes. As long as you don't do something that feels wrong, you're probably on the right track.

[She got so horribly off-track recently that the statement feels rather hypocritical, and it shows in the grim expression on her face.]

Yeah... it's just, sometimes things don't feel wrong until it's too late. But then you just have to do your best and deal with the consequences.

[ in hindsight murdering his abusive aunt was probably a bad call... probably... ]

Are you okay? You look a little... [ he's not quite sure how to put it. ]

And sometimes they feel wrong even as you're doing them, but you can't think of what else to do. [Now there's audible pain in her voice, but when he asks about it, she manages a smile.]

I'm fine, thanks. There was just... a pretty hard time here a couple of weeks ago. A lot of people were reduced to their basest level just to survive. Some of us are still coping with it.

Yeah... exactly like that. [ he knows that feeling all too well. ] Sometimes you have no choice but to do something wrong. Sometimes that's just the best solution to an impossible problem.

I... I see. Well, if you want to talk about it, I'd like to listen.

There - there was - [Her voice catches, but she clears her throat and continues. She's getting better, right? She can sleep and eat, so she can talk about this without cracking?]

- a darkness. It came to the city and started infecting people. They were called Taken, and they were... just monsters. Killing machines. One of them got me early on, stabbed me in the black multiple times and left me to bleed out. It was so painful, and so horrible - nothing can describe that pain. And my boyfriend found me, so I died in front of his eyes.

[She stares down at her feet for a moment, then forces herself to continue. At this point, the story would be a bit confusing without clarification.]

But death isn't permanent here, so I came back, and I was determined that no one else should go through what I did. I wanted to save everyone in the city. The thing is, you couldn't cure or fix the Taken... the only way to stop them was to kill them.

So... I killed. For two days straight. I did nothing but kill. People I recognised, people I knew, people who had never done anything to harm me. I probably killed about 50 of them. 50 human beings who just had the bad luck to be infected. [She swallows heavily.] I never want to see blood on my hands again.

I... I see...

[ satoshi isn't quite sure how to respond. whatever he might have expected, that story definitely surpassed it. darkness? Taken? he can't really imagine anything like that. but even worse, dying in front of someone you loved... ]

You did what you had to do. Not just for yourself, but to protect others.

[ he swallows the lump forming in his own throat, the memory of something he'd rather forget resurfacing. he didn't have nearly as much blood on his hands as nakama might have, but he knew his sin was probably heavier. ]

I don't know whether you did the right thing, but... I probably would have done something like that too.

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