asgardeventide | 001 ♊ text

[ Stuck somewhere you don't want to be? Time to be a brat about it. Cue terrible teenager hissyfit incoming in 3... 2... 1... ]

ii wa2 doiing 2ome thiinking
real deep 2oul 2earchiing 2hiit about beiing here
and ii came two a conclu2iion:
ii hate thii2 place and ii hate everyone here
actually ii diidn't even have two thiink very long or hard about it
everyone ii2 all liike
2ave u2 2ollux you're our only hope two not be hopele22ly boriing and mindle22 for the re2t of our mii2erable liive2
(two whiich ii have two 2ay welcome to beiing me hope you hate your own exii2tence a2 much as ii do)
and all ii really want two do ii2 go back two lyiing on that 2hiitty horn piile and talk about 2hitty feeliing2

ii have an iidea though ju2t hear me out
what ii do ii2 ii trade iin thii2 gaudy piiece of crap bracelet
take my p2iioniic2 and my mutant braiin and all that other 2hiit
buy a tiicket for the get the fuck out of here expre22
and go back two that 2hiitty rock
fuckiing geniiu2 ii know

p2 before anyone 2ay2 iit
ii don't know you and you defiiniitely don't know me
maybe you thiink you know 2ome other me but you don't
2o don't even go there

[ translation:

I was doing some thinking
Real deep soul searching shit about being here
And I came to a conclusion:
I hate this place and I hate everyone here
Actually I didn't even have to think very long or hard about it
Everyone is all like
Save us Sollux you're our only hope to not be hopelessly boring and mindless for the rest of our miserable lives
(To which I have to say welcome to being me hope you hate your own existence as much as I do)
And all I really want to do is go back to lying on that shitty horn pile and talk about shitty feelings

I have an idea though just hear me out
What I do is I trade in this gaudy piece of crap bracelet
Take my psionics and my mutant brain and all that other shit
Buy a ticket for the Get The Fuck Out of Here Express
And go back to that shitty rock
Fucking genius I know

P.S. before anyone says it
I don't know you and you definitely don't know me
Maybe you think you know some other me but you don't
So don't even go there ]

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