001 ♊ text

[iin2ufferable]

[ Stuck somewhere you don't want to be? Time to be a brat about it. Cue terrible teenager hissyfit incoming in 3... 2... 1... ]

ii wa2 doiing 2ome thiinking
real deep 2oul 2earchiing 2hiit about beiing here
and ii came two a conclu2iion:
ii hate thii2 place and ii hate everyone here
actually ii diidn't even have two thiink very long or hard about it
everyone ii2 all liike
2ave u2 2ollux you're our only hope two not be hopele22ly boriing and mindle22 for the re2t of our mii2erable liive2
(two whiich ii have two 2ay welcome to beiing me hope you hate your own exii2tence a2 much as ii do)
and all ii really want two do ii2 go back two lyiing on that 2hiitty horn piile and talk about 2hitty feeliing2

ii have an iidea though ju2t hear me out
what ii do ii2 ii trade iin thii2 gaudy piiece of crap bracelet
take my p2iioniic2 and my mutant braiin and all that other 2hiit
buy a tiicket for the get the fuck out of here expre22
and go back two that 2hiitty rock
fuckiing geniiu2 ii know

p2 before anyone 2ay2 iit
ii don't know you and you defiiniitely don't know me
maybe you thiink you know 2ome other me but you don't
2o don't even go there

[ translation:

I was doing some thinking
Real deep soul searching shit about being here
And I came to a conclusion:
I hate this place and I hate everyone here
Actually I didn't even have to think very long or hard about it
Everyone is all like
Save us Sollux you're our only hope to not be hopelessly boring and mindless for the rest of our miserable lives
(To which I have to say welcome to being me hope you hate your own existence as much as I do)
And all I really want to do is go back to lying on that shitty horn pile and talk about shitty feelings

I have an idea though just hear me out
What I do is I trade in this gaudy piece of crap bracelet
Take my psionics and my mutant brain and all that other shit
Buy a ticket for the Get The Fuck Out of Here Express
And go back to that shitty rock
Fucking genius I know

P.S. before anyone says it
I don't know you and you definitely don't know me
Maybe you think you know some other me but you don't
So don't even go there ]

Comments

[iin2ufferable]

[ NOT THIS AGAIN. ]

pro tiip:
ju2t drop iit already

[nukeoleptic]

i cant just drop it!!!!
that is not a thing i can do arhghhg

[iin2ufferable]

ye2 you can
by not talkiing two me about iit
iit'2 really not hard
at all

[nukeoleptic]

[ Can she bribe him? Will that work? She is going to try. :| ]

.... i have a computer you can have if you listen to me :/

[iin2ufferable]

what are you tryiing two briibe me
liike giiviing me 2omethiing ii don't even want ii2 goiing two magiically change my miind?

[nukeoleptic]

why would you not want a computer??
seriously, what else are you going to do here to keep yourself busy??

[iin2ufferable]

unle22 you can magiically maniife2t an iinternet
whiich you can't becau2e magiic ii2n't real
and even iif you could nobody el2e would be on iit
how do you expect me two kiick the a22e2 of nub2 iin every game ever wiithout any nub2 two kiick?
you 2hould really thiink the2e thiing2 out a liitle fiir2t

[nukeoleptic]

well... i do have a video game system :T
and a lot of multiplayer games
you could kick asses on that if you wanted to borrow it! :|

[iin2ufferable]

2tiill not iintere2ted.

[ Yes he is he's just being stubborn. ]

[nukeoleptic]

bluhhh >T
okay, fine!!!
i will just play all the video games myself X(

[iin2ufferable]

wow that'2 lame
playiing game2 alone
who even doe2 that

[nukeoleptic]

:/!!!
people who are home alone sometimes!!
there is nothing wrong with playing video games alone
maybe everyone is just too scared to play with me!

[iin2ufferable]

gee ii wonder why
let me gue22 iit'2 becau2e you're that bada22
and not becau2e you u2e your friiend2 a2 liiviing batteriie2 or anythiing

[ Sorry Jade he's still bitter. ]

[nukeoleptic]

[ He probably should be bitter -- Jade just doesn't understand the why, yet. ]

wait.... okay, can you please explain to me why you are so angry about that?
i am being completely serious here
you had energy lending and you helped me because you wanted to

also.... if you are going to say that our friendship before didnt count, then you cant make that count, either
it is all or nothing, buster

[iin2ufferable]

iit 2tiill count2 iif you diid iit two 2ome other poor 2ucker
are you really hone2tly that cluele22 though

[nukeoleptic]

yes
i am really, honestly that clueless

[iin2ufferable]

fiine
ju2t forget iit then
iif you don't talk about iit
ii won't talk about iit

[nukeoleptic]

can you at least give me like
i dont know :/
an exact drawing of what it was that i said that is bad
because i am assuming it is the living battery thing but i am not exactly sure
and i dont want to accidentally do that again

[iin2ufferable]

ju2t
don't even talk about anythiing remotely related two iit
iit'2 not hard
take iit or leave iit

[nukeoleptic]

... okay apparently i hit the nail on the head
i promise i will not say a word even slightly related to that
cross my heart, etc