[Anon Text] The editors are not responsible for any possible side effects.

[2cool4guardian]

 

Denizens of Asgard!
You wanted to know the truth about these so called gods?
The As(s)Guardian has heard you!
No more secrets! No more unanswered questions!
ARE YOUR BODIES WELL PREPARED?

The truth is shocking, isn't it?
How is it possible to be living under the ruling of such vitiate deities?
Well, dear readers, it shouldn't be a problem at all.
BECAUSE THE TRAVELLERS ARE AS BAD AS THEIR UNPOPULAR GODS!

And let's not forget about our blinging redhead and his collection of fanboys and fangirls!
Or should we say 'his pimps and ho's

Asgard is sure filled with tragic love stories, isn't it?
We could even say... inspiring!
ALLOW LADIES ROXY AND EURI TO SHARE THE MOST ROMANTIC LITERATURE WRITTEN BY THEIR VERY OWN LOVING HANDS

The keen eyes of The As(s)guardian have noticed that some of our lovely denizens struggle with the act of kissing. And if isn't the act of kissing itself it is kissing the wrong person!
My, such tragedy!
Therefore our glorious magazine has provided a most handy Kissing Guide. The complete overview of how to kiss with the tongues. We also had the (involuntary) help of Asgard's most famous kissing ninja duo: Whiskers and Sasuke. Please utilize this handy-dandy guide and become a MASTER OF KISSING!





{Images based on real events. That's what they teach you in ninja academy.}

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((ooc: Well, ladies and gentlemen, here it is! The post for the Gossip Girl plot! Anything too dumb I'm blaming it on Loki. I'm turning off my notifs so feel free to mingle and jump on each other. Remember the network is glitchy so have fun with that too! Jack and Loki will anonfail some time in the comments so keep an eye out for them. If you need to contact us for anything, comment on the ooc plotting post or shoot us a pm.))

Comments

audio;

[no_dreams_for_you]

I see. Is there an age requirement for that position?

[Civilians are fascinating to him, how differently they run things from ninja.]

audio;

[occulthymns]

No, but no one would think she has enough experience. Witches live a lot longer than humans, so it makes sense to us.

audio;

[no_dreams_for_you]

You are a witch? [Even more intrigued now. He certainly hasn’t met a witch before.] Do you specialize in magical abilities and knowledge?

audio;

[occulthymns]

Yep! Black magic and herbalism! My black magic doesn't work here, though.

audio;

[no_dreams_for_you]

[Ah, no wonder she runs that magic shop. How fitting.]

No, due to the necessity of the seal. However, your herbalism techniques can still serve their purpose in this world, correct?

audio;

[occulthymns]

Yeah! There are a lot of magical plants here, and you can train to get a herbalist license in one of the neighbouring cities to work with them. It isn't ideal but it's better than nothing.

audio;

[no_dreams_for_you]

Mmm. A rather useful technique to possess.

An herbalist license? That is a requirement in order to utilize these plants?

audio;

[occulthymns]

The magical ones, yes. So if you're serious about using them you'll have to go to Utgard and pass their stupid test.

audio;

[no_dreams_for_you]

Have you found it worthwhile?

audio;

[occulthymns]

Of course! It was important to me back home, and it's still important to me here.