asgardeventide | => 001

[The feed cuts in at the Heimdall Welcome Hall, and a troll that may be familiar to several individuals appears on the screen.]

WELP.

THIS SURE IS GREAT.

I LOVE BEING UPROOTED FROM ONE SHITTY SITUATION TO ANOTHER, MORE ASININE ONE. MOST DEFINITELY MY FAVORITE THING IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE. ASK ANYONE.

SO, WHAT? I GUESS I LIVE HERE NOW?? WHATEVER. I THINK I'M SUPPOSED TO BE SAYING HELLO TO EVERYBODY, BUT I REALLY DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY.

[Karkat probably doesn't have time to actually say anything because there's suddenly a shout.] Karkat? Karkat! [The video feed is probably a blur of motion with lots of greys, blacks, and reds. There's a face that hasn't been around recently. Aradia has bounded over to Karkat and is basically invading all his personal space.]

When did you get here? Have you talked to Sollux or anyone else? A lot of our friends are here you know! You have to tell me what point of the timeline you're from.

[Aradia had lost her bracelet and is pretty much oblivious to what's been happening as of late.] I guess we got here at the same time! I mean I was here earlier but I lost my bracelet hehe.

ARADIA, STOP. I ONLY GOT LIKE HALF OF THAT--

HANG ON.

[The feed is cut.]

(( Grey is Karkat, Red is Aradia.))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

WHAT DO YOU MEAN? IS THERE A PENALTY FOR NOT ACTUALLY USING THESE SHITTY POWERS?

eh, iif you count gettiing thrown iinto iincrea2iingly de2perate 2iituatiion2 where the choiice two u2e them or not could mean liife or death, ii gue22 there'2 a penalty.

SUPER.
THE NEWS JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER.

doe2nt iit alway2.
you diidnt actually expect me two have anythiing po2iitiive two 2ay about thii2, diid you.

NO, HEARING ANYTHING POSITIVE FROM YOU WOULD BE WISHFUL THINKING.
BUT THAT'S COOL.
I'D RATHER HAVE SOMEONE TELL ME THE TRUTH THAN TRY TO MAKE THIS PLACE SOUND BETTER THAN IT IS.

dont talk two jade about iit then.

WELL, YEAH.
OF COURSE JADE'S GOING TO THINK THIS PLACE IS AWESOME.
THAT'S JUST HOW SHE IS, OR AT LEAST HOW I REMEMBER HER BEING.

no, that2
how 2he ii2.
iit2 ju2t weiird ii2 all.

NOT FOR HER. TRUST ME.

eheh, ii dont need two take your word on iit two know your giirlfriiend ii2 a nutca2e liike that.
iit'2 not liike iit'2 not 2o blatantly obviiou2 that ii could fiigure iit out even iif ii were currently bliind liike ii hear ii wiill be iin 2ome undefiined but 2oon moment.

WOAH TIME OUT.
WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT GIRLFRIEND?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF SMARTASS JOKE ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE HERE?

eheheheh well john 2hot you down riight, iit make2 2en2e that youd ju2t move on two hii2 near genetiic dupliicate..
iit wa2 2o obviiou2 you were ob2e22ed wiith them.

WHETHER OR NOT I HAD ANY SORT OF AFFINITY FOR EITHER OF THEM AT ANY POINT IN TIME IS NEITHER HERE NOR THERE.
NOT THAT I'M SAYING I DID.
BUT IF I DID, IT WOULD HAVE BEEN OVER A SWEEP AGO FOR ME. IT'S PRACTICALLY ANCIENT HISTORY.

riight, ii forgot, the meteor.
2o doe2 thii2 mean youre iinto 2trider2 now two, becau2e ii am permabanniing you iif that ii2 the ca2e, we can never 2peak agaiin iif your thiinkpan ha2 rotted 2o thoroughly that you thiink that ii2 a legiitiimate and attractiive optiion.

HOLY SHIT, NO. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?
LOOK, I CAN ADMIT THAT LALONDE AND STRIDER AREN'T COMPLETELY HORRIBLE ONCE YOU GET TO KNOW THEM.
WELL, LALONDE ISN'T.
BUT IF YOU THINK I'D EVER GARNER INTEREST FOR EITHER OF THEM, I'M GONNA PERMABAND YOU FROM THIS FRIENDSHIP.

oh my god plea2e you are the la2t per2on ii worry about fiiguriing out how two permaban me from anythiing.
you cant even 2pell permaban, how the hell do you thiink you could actually work out a fea2iible foolproof way two keep me out?
2poiiler2, you cant, there2 no d iin that word, end of 2tory, ii wiin.
even iif you triied iit wouldnt make me any le22 riight about any of thii2, you are 2o nau2eatiingly defen2iive that iit2 obviiou2 you are tryiing, iineptly miight ii add, two cover 2hiit up.
ju2t accept defeat.

Edited 2012-12-19 02:26 (UTC)

HI. IT'S CALLED A TYPO YOU DIPSHIT.
AND I AM BEING DEAD FUCKING SERIOUS HERE. I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I'M NOT LOOKING FOR ANY SORT OF RELATIONSHIP WITH ANYONE.
SO STOP TRYING TO GET MY BLEETING HOOFBEAST BECAUSE YOU'VE GOT NOTHING ON ME.

really.
you 2pend all your tiime pryiing iinto the per2onal liive2 of other people tryiing two get them two a2k you for adviice.
you watch anythiing wiith even a hiint of a romantiic subplot.
and you are tryiing two pa22 iit off liike youre not iintere2ted iin iit, at all.

YOU'RE AN IDIOT.
I NEVER DENIED BEING INTERESTED IN THE STUDY OF ROMANCE.
I'M JUST SAYING I'M NOT LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP RIGHT NOW.
COME ON, THAT CAN'T BE HARD TO COMPREHEND, EVEN FOR YOU.

oh iit'2 not hard two comprehend, iit'2 ju2t hard two beliieve.
completely iimpo22iible, iin fact.

WELL BELIEVE IT.
I'M PERFECTLY FINE ALL BY MYSELF.

eheheheheh yeah ok whatever kk.
anythiing el2e you want two a2k about?

I DON'T KNOW.
WE COVERED WHERE WE ARE, WHAT WE'RE DOING.
I'M PRETTY SURE THERE'S NOTHING FUN TO DO HERE, SO FUCK ASKING ABOUT THAT.
I GUESS WE'RE DONE.

fuck you two, kk.
2ee you around then.

YOU ASKED.
FINE. LATER ASSHOLE.

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