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asgardeventide2011-12-20 10:12 pm
katlocked.livejournal.com) wrote in asgardeventide2011-12-20 10:12 pm
♠002♥ [Video]
[Hello there, Asgard. Have a troll, laying back on his bed in his room over in Hel house. He's got his pillows and blankets piled against the wall, leaning back against them with his knees bent up and his arms pulled in around his stomach. He's set the bracelet on the nightstand, where it records him looking down at his fingers while he plays with his nails and thinks for a moment. Then he looks up at the recording, taking in a deep breath before he starts.]
Alright, so after explaining what the fuck I am and what I've done for the two-thousand-eight-hundred-and-thirty-sixth time, I think it's time to get a little back from at least the halfway-intelligent of the rest of you.
Basically, I have way too much fucking time on my hands all of a sudden, and I don't know really know what to do with it, so I might as well get a little more involved in the "community" if I have to put up with all of you nooksucking woobie idiots. In short, you can all be reassured that it's out of sheer, mind-numbing boredom that I'm even acknowledging the minuscule amount of curiosity I harbor toward the multitude of universes you've all been unceremoniously ripped from at what I can only assume was the worst moment possible. If you haven't caught on yet, I'll make it perfectly clear what I'm talking about.
I want you to tell me where you're from. Describe to me, in the most intelligent manner possible, what your home world was like. And don't just give me stupid hoofbeastshit stories. I might have copious amounts of time, but not enough for you to waste with grueling dribble about exactly how vaguely "cool" or "awesome" or "boring" your world is. Make it interesting.
[He pauses, making a bit of a face as he realizes something.]
Oh, yeah.
If anyone else from Alternia has gotten here, and we haven't talked yet, we need to, so get a hold of me.
Alright, so after explaining what the fuck I am and what I've done for the two-thousand-eight-hundred-and-thirty-sixth time, I think it's time to get a little back from at least the halfway-intelligent of the rest of you.
Basically, I have way too much fucking time on my hands all of a sudden, and I don't know really know what to do with it, so I might as well get a little more involved in the "community" if I have to put up with all of you nooksucking woobie idiots. In short, you can all be reassured that it's out of sheer, mind-numbing boredom that I'm even acknowledging the minuscule amount of curiosity I harbor toward the multitude of universes you've all been unceremoniously ripped from at what I can only assume was the worst moment possible. If you haven't caught on yet, I'll make it perfectly clear what I'm talking about.
I want you to tell me where you're from. Describe to me, in the most intelligent manner possible, what your home world was like. And don't just give me stupid hoofbeastshit stories. I might have copious amounts of time, but not enough for you to waste with grueling dribble about exactly how vaguely "cool" or "awesome" or "boring" your world is. Make it interesting.
[He pauses, making a bit of a face as he realizes something.]
Oh, yeah.
If anyone else from Alternia has gotten here, and we haven't talked yet, we need to, so get a hold of me.
video.
video.
video.
[ But he doesn't really have an opinion about dogs and cats. Just thinks it's interesting that apparently they exist on other planets too. ]
What other stuff did you have on Alternia? Flying cars?
video.
video.
video.
video.
Usually people find it charming.
video.
video.
video.
video.
video.
[As is sarcasm and being an ass, apparently.]
video.
[ And he wins. The end. ]