Stiles Stilinski (
teenyoda) wrote in
asgardeventide2014-05-11 12:58 am
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Video - Day 446
[When the feed clicks on, it shows a dark room with very little light. Anyone who peers a little more closely can see via the light from the screen that the caller, Stiles, is in a bathroom. With the lights off. He appears to be a bit stressed out and is on the floor, looking almost fearfully over behind the screen. There's a clawing noise and little squawks and chirps coming from it.]
Okay. Okay. Um... Okay. Would, ah, would someone mind telling me what the hell a dragon is doing in my house? Like, a real dragon? Oh god... it was trying to eat my feet. I think I'm bleeding. Am I bleeding? I might be. It was chewing on my toes. What the hell... How did a dragon get in my room?
[To anyone that knows Stiles and the aforementioned dragon, something might seem a little... off. Like why Stiles doesn't know said dragon is his.]
Scott? Rachel? Do not come in the house. Seriously. I... it might eat your faces off. I happen to like your faces right where they are. Please don't lose them.
[The fact that Stiles is whispering, sort of, and sounding stressed has Hale scratching a bit more intently at the door, little snout trying to fit in under it as he chirps at 'daddy'.]
Oh god. Oh god, it's going to come in and chew off all my favorite parts. If I don't make it out alive, Rachel, I love you. Scott, please take care of her. Derek... somehow this is Peter's fault. Kick his ass.
Okay. Okay. Um... Okay. Would, ah, would someone mind telling me what the hell a dragon is doing in my house? Like, a real dragon? Oh god... it was trying to eat my feet. I think I'm bleeding. Am I bleeding? I might be. It was chewing on my toes. What the hell... How did a dragon get in my room?
[To anyone that knows Stiles and the aforementioned dragon, something might seem a little... off. Like why Stiles doesn't know said dragon is his.]
Scott? Rachel? Do not come in the house. Seriously. I... it might eat your faces off. I happen to like your faces right where they are. Please don't lose them.
[The fact that Stiles is whispering, sort of, and sounding stressed has Hale scratching a bit more intently at the door, little snout trying to fit in under it as he chirps at 'daddy'.]
Oh god. Oh god, it's going to come in and chew off all my favorite parts. If I don't make it out alive, Rachel, I love you. Scott, please take care of her. Derek... somehow this is Peter's fault. Kick his ass.
voice;
I literally give up.
Voice
What? What... you jerk. What did you do? I didn't even do anything.
voice forever
Do you want me to come over and kill it for you? I could always do that.
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Oops.
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[He didn't even want Peter knowing where he lived. Unless he already did. God, what if this was a trap?]
Why would you do this?
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And he is going to 100% keep playing along for as long as he can. ]
Because I'm an evil diabolical mastermind set on ruining you life. Duh, Stiles.
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Dick.
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As hilarious as playing with your unsurprising idiocy has been, Stiles. I should probably avoid the chances of giving you irreparable brain damage and let you know that it wasn't me.
I mean really? Dragons? I killed me own niece, may have tried to give Scott's mom the bite, and then well... there's Lydia. I could seriously do worse if I really wanted to.
Or cared.
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[GOD, HE HATED YOU, PETER. SO MUCH.]
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Also? If the dragon is actually in your house, I'm seriously questioning how much of a threat it really is. Sounds more like an over-sized pet lizard.
Are you sure it's not Jackson?
[ :) :) ]
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I just kind of ran with it.
Really, you were totally asking for that one.
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Tearing someone's throat out with your teeth really isn't the same as eating them. Just putting that out there.
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But you would know, wouldn't you? Mister totally in control while wolfed out. Right? Oh, wait...
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That's masochistic. Even for you.
Then again, seeing how easily you almost considered receiving the bite from me, I'm really not all that surprised.
Have you told Rachel about that part? Actually, I'm pretty sure Scott doesn't even know.
Details.
not heeere
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How much did that run by the way?
I will totes pay you back seeing as we're like, bee eff effs now.
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I don't even think you'd be your best friend, Peter. That's probably why you troll everyone so much. You're so disgusting, even you can't stand your company.
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Actually. I'm finding quite a few people here who are uncannily similar to myself and I gotta say, it's pretty nice. And no, why I "troll" all of you so much is because gauging violent and overly emotional reactions out of teenage children is so unbelievably easy. Like, seriously.
For example, watch this:
How far have you gotten with Rachel yet? First? Second? Third base? Any base? Did you ever actually score with Lydia before that? Speaking of scoring, I'm actually pretty sure I got a heck of a lot further with her than you ever did or will.
How are you feeling right now, Stiles?
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Don't ever even say Rachel's name. You stay the hell away from her. Her and Lydia, you spineless piece of shit. You're not the big bad here, Peter. Not anymore. You come anywhere near anyone I care about and I'll make your house fire seem like a freakin' camp out.
[Breathe, Stilinski. Don't set your own house on fire.]
You don't get to talk about Lydia like that. How would you like it if someone mentioned your daughter like that, huh? You want to know any of the gory deets with her?
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Wait.
Record scratch.
HOLD ON A SECOND. ]
What are you talking about?
[ Fuck everything else that Stiles just said. Really. He wouldn't take anything Stiles Stilinski says with so much as a grain of salt but that. Literally came out of nowhere. So. ]
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You heard me. Or is your age catching up with you now, making you hard of hearing? You finally getting old, Peter?
[He was still angry, still furious, but it was simmering as he heard Peter's... what? Confusion? Disbelief?]
GOING TO PRIVATE NOW
PRIVATE: HAHAH
PRIVATE: SHAME
PRIVATE: ON HIM
PRIVATE: SHAKES HEAD FOREVER
PRIVATE: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU CONSORT WITH TEENAGERS
PRIVATE: hales will never ever learn
PRIVATE: No, no they won't
PRIVATE: such is life in soviet beacon hills