Video - Day 386

[teenyoda]

[Stiles' face shows up on the screen and he's looking maybe just a little worse for wear. There's lines around his eyes and he looks like he hasn't been sleeping well.]

So, the timing on this could be better. I'll be jumping on the wagon to Alfheim tomorrow morning and, um, I need a favor.

[He really should have locked this from his dad, but he hadn't really been on his game when he'd decided to make this.]

Could someone come in and check up on Scott while I'm gone? He went all grey and we can't find his bracelet. I've got him sort of... tied up to his bed, but I need someone to come by and make sure he eats and uh, you know, bathroom stuff.

[Anyone who knew him could see this wasn't an easy thing to ask. Someone was feeling especially guilty at the moment.]

I can't leave him like that, so if no one can do it, I'll just have to, ah, let him go. But with all this going on right now...

I'd just really appreciate a little help. I'll owe someone. Hugely.

[There's a pause, then Stiles looks directly into the screen instead of letting his eyes jump all around it.]

Please.

Comments

[gymnast]

[ Her jaw clenches a little. ] You think I'm not aware of that, Stiles? I've been here longer than you. I've tried to bring everyone together, to work with everybody - including Derek - but you don't understand what I'm going through. I'm not denying that he still matters to me, but I can't-- [ She presses her lips together for a moment. ] You just don't get it.

[teenyoda]

No, I don't. And you know why I don't? Because no one says anything. So I'm just left to guess, and then I guess wrong and baskets and tables are flipped and juice and mashed potatoes and jello gets spilled and that's a huge mess to clean up, Allison.

[Okay, so he was overboard with his metaphor a bit. Shh.]

Derek's an ass, okay. We get that. But Scott's not. Do you really think he'd be anything but okay with you? Like, ever?

[gymnast]

[ Well, Allison doesn't like talking about her feelings, so... ]

I know how Scott is, Stiles. Believe me. [ She was breaking up with him and he was still being incredibly sweet, telling her that it was okay when it so clearly wasn't. Even when she got back here and had to do it again, he was sweeter than she deserved. ] But I broke up with him. Twice. [ She feels like she doesn't deserve his niceness, for them to just magically be friends again. ] I can't tell him I need space and then turn around and hover over him. Even if he's okay with it.

[ She also might not trust herself to keep things on a strict friends-only sort of level. Because the break up wasn't about her not wanting him anymore or not caring about him anymore; the attraction and the draw and the love is still there and Allison, especially right now, isn't sure she's strong enough to resist. ]

[teenyoda]

Here's a question. Do you even want to be broken up? I mean, clearly there's something going on with you and him and Isaac and I have no idea what it is, but it's something. Considering what we go through here, isn't something better than nothing?

[gymnast]

[ DO YOU REALLY HAVE TO ASK THE HARD QUESTIONS, STILES? Allison's just going to deflect. Sort of. ]

Between me and Scott and between Scott and Isaac, you mean. [ Isaac and her are friends. She thinks. That's a whole other complication she has yet to figure out completely, so she hasn't even fully started examining her feelings towards him, let alone her feelings towards the three of them.

Yes, Allison is actually somehow emotionally behind Isaac. ]

[teenyoda]

[YES HE DOES. MAYBE SOMEONE WILL ANSWER THEM.]

Between all three of you. I mean, it's not like I'm stalking you guys, but from what Scott's said, there's something between you and him and between him and Isaac. Aaaand between you and Isaac.

You realize polygamy is a thing, right? Not a bad thing if all parties are involved and stuff, but, it does work. Just not in that 'I have fifty sister-wives' sort of way.

[gymnast]

[ WELL TODAY IS NOT THAT DAY because this is so not the conversation Allison was expecting to have. Pretty much ever. So she's just going to stop it from going any further (she hopes; she knows how Stiles can get sometimes) because she can't even wrap her head around being with Scott right now, let alone being with him and Isaac. ]

Shouldn't you be getting ready to go to Alfheim?

[teenyoda]

[Maybe someone wouldn't be so cranky if they were getting some... =|]

Train's leaving tomorrow. I'll probably sleep most of the way there since I have a feeling I'm not getting a good one tonight. Your topic change was noted, by the way, and yes, Allison, I'll have a safe trip and come home in one piece. Thanks for your concern.

[gymnast]

[ Shut up, Stiles. :| She has plenty reason to be cranky.

Even though she's rattled - by the entire conversation, honestly, not just the polygamy part - Allison feels a little guilty at the last part of that. She sighs and closes her eyes for a moment as she rubs her forehead. Sometimes you are a serious headache, Stiles. ]

I am actually concerned, you know. [ Even if she's flustered and a little irritated with him pushing all of this. She'll work on being friends with Scott when she's ready, not when Stiles thinks it's time. ] So be careful. And try not to do anything stupid. Scott doesn't need to... un-grey and find out his best friend ended up getting himself into trouble.

[teenyoda]

[Get some lovin', Allison. It does a body good.

Welcome to his friend's circle. Feel their pain.]

What's the worst that can happen? I die? Again? I'm kind of getting used to it.

[gymnast]

Just because you are doesn't mean everyone else is.

[teenyoda]

Is this the part where I say 'my life, my problem'? Because, you know, not everyone is used to the tension between you three.

[Tit for tat, Allison.]

[gymnast]

[ DAMNIT STILES. ]

You dying repeatedly isn't the same as whatever you think's going on between me, Scott, and Isaac.

[teenyoda]

Me dying repeatedly means I come back repeatedly. You and Isaac and Scott, you guys have this constant tension that's making it really hard to just...

I mean, you didn't even want to come for Christmas. You did, and I'm glad you did, but how is you three not wanting to be in the same area together helping anyone?

[gymnast]

[ Fine, you wanna play that game, Stiles? ]

How is being forced to talk about this or you trying to convince me to do something when I'm not ready helping anyone? I need time, which Scott said he was fine with, so why can't you just leave it alone? Why are you so desperate to make things how you think they should be when you think they should be when you're not even directly involved?

[teenyoda]

Because I am directly involved. You're my friend. Scott's my friend. Isaac's my...

Friendish. When you're all acting like this around each other, it affects me. I mean, obviously not as much as it affects you guys, but come on, Allison. I'd have to be Derek levels of do not care not to notice this. Ignoring it isn't helping.

Don't want to talk to me? Fine, don't talk to me. But talk to someone about it, otherwise nothing's going to get done or fixed and however long we're all still stuck here for is going to be incredibly uncomfortable.

[gymnast]

[ It's not just about feeling like she's not in the right mindset to date anyone, though. If it was just that, she'd be fine with doing what Stiles wants; finding someone to talk to, working all of this out. But: ] Talking won't bring my mom back. [ Her voice is a little quieter now, though no less hard than it had been. ] It won't change the fact that because of me, because I couldn't let him go, Scott almost died back home. Where he can't come back. [ What happens if her mom shows up here? It's not like dead people can't show up and even if Scott could come back to life here, what would stop her mom from killing him over and over again all because Allison can't keep her distance? And, if she even started to entertain what Stiles said about Isaac, too, what would stop her mom from going after him, too?

'What if?' isn't a good way to live her life, she knows that, but it's not just about that, either. She needs time to grieve over her mom; the fact that she tried to kill Scott doesn't change the fact that she was Allison's parent. ]

I'm sorry that you're uncomfortable, but the only way I know how to fix that right now is to distance myself from Scott.

[teenyoda]

Um, no, Allison. Newsflash; you don't control your parents. Trust me, if I could, I'd make my dad stop sneaking cheeseburgers. Your mom did what she did beca--

[No, Stiles. Don't call her mom a crazy psychopath. She'd just died for her. A bit too harsh.]

She did it herself. Your dad didn't make her. You didn't make her. Scott didn't make her. Plenty of people can find other constructive ways to deal with their kids dating people they don't want without trying to kill them. That's completely on your mom, not you.

But hey, I get it, okay? Losing your mom is hard, no matter how it happens. But I would have thought you'd want someone to help you through that. Not to rub salt in anything, but you don't have a lot of choices here. Your dad's not here to help and... well, I mean you can always go talk to my dad if you want.

[Sheriff Stilinski: everyone's dad in Asgard.]

It's not just me, though. It's you, and it's Isaac, and it's Scott. You're all miserable and that sucks, okay?

[gymnast]

[ And here Allison thought she was done with the tears. Apparently she was wrong, though; her throat feels tight and she can feel the now all too familiar sting of the tears in her eyes. But she refuses to start crying. She swallows roughly, hoping to get her throat to loosen up, and glances away from her bracelet for a moment.

He's right about her wanting someone to help and that she doesn't have a lot of choices, but that doesn't mean she's ready to turn to Scott or Isaac. It's not fair to either of them after what happened. She's made friends here; she'll find someone else to lean on. (Maybe. She is still an Argent and, thus, doesn't really want to lean on anyone at all.) ]

It does suck. [ She can't deny that this whole situation sucks, but Stiles still doesn't get it. He thinks this can all be fixed if she would just get over it, but it's not that easy. She can't undo the choices she's made, she can't forget what her mom did, she can't forget that her mom's dead. It's too much to just push past; she needs time. She needs to focus on herself. ] But I just can't fix this right now. I'm sorry.

[ But sorry doesn't change anything, either. ]

[teenyoda]

[Aww... he didn't want to make her cry. Way to go, Stilinski.]

I know it's hard. Believe me, I know. But you need someone to talk to. Not about the, uh, Scott and Isaac stuff. Talk to my dad. Or someone here you're comfortable with, but talk to them. If you keep it in it just...

[He chewed on his lip, remembering that first year.]

It doesn't get better.

[gymnast]

I barely even know your dad. [ They've only talked a couple times, one of which was when he pulled her over and Allison broke down in front of him. There's no way she'd want to risk that happening again.

Maybe she'll talk to Jo. After all, Jo was the one there when Allison woke up; she knows that Allison's mom is dead, that things are seriously complicated. And Jo's lost a parent, too. Probably not in the same way, but... She'd understand, at least. ]

[teenyoda]

So? He's my dad. He's lost someone too. And he's the sheriff, so, you know, kind of used to being there for people.

But whoever you want to, find someone to talk to. It helps.

[gymnast]

[ Alright, yeah, Stiles has a point in regards to his dad. But Allison's still not sure she'd feel comfortable enough, even if the Sheriff is used to helping people out. Still, she nods. ]

I will. [ She sniffles a little and looks back towards the bracelet. ] Do actually try to be careful in Alfheim, okay?

[teenyoda]

Don't worry. I'm not exactly planning on coming back in a body bag. Rach is going too, so I have to keep an eye on her.

And, you know, Isaac.

[gymnast]

[ Well, you made her tear up, Stiles, but now you're also getting a tiny little smile out of her. ]

She's pretty, you know. Rachel. I haven't met her yet so I can't really say anything else about her, but...