1ST JEER [text]

[deudly]

HEY.
HEY.
THE FUCK IS THIS? THE FUCK WAS ALL THAT?
WHAT IS ALL THIS BULLSHIT ABOUT HOUSES. AND GODS. AND OTHER BORING BULLSHIT. WHO CARES?
THAT BITCH PRATTLED ON. FOR SO LONG. I THOUGHT I WOULD DIE. OF BOREDOM. SO I STOPPED LISTENING AFTER A WHILE.
HEY. HEY.
HEY!!
I WANT ANSWERS.
DON'T THINK I WON'T KEEP DOING THIS. UNTIL YOU GIVE THEM TO ME. GUY BEHIND THE COMPUTER.
NOT THAT THIS IS A COMPUTER. IT'S MORE LIKE A SHITTY BRACELET.
BUT WHO CARES I KNOW YOU ARE OUT THERE.
I AM HOLDING YOU AT RANSOM. UNTIL YOU ANSWER ME. I WILL KEEP THIS UP UNTIL YOU DO.
ALSO. BEFORE I FORGET. WHERE ARE MY GIANT OGRES?
I SWEAR IF YOU DID ANYTHING TO MY OGRES. I WILL KILL YOU.
......
CAN I AT LEAST HAVE MAROON-STRIPE HAT BACK?
I SERIOUSLY JUST GOT HIM AND I MISS HIM ALREADY.
WHAT A PAL.
HE LET ME RIDE ON HIS SHOULDER. AND PUNCHED SOME WEIRD HUMAN SO HARD. HE RIPPED A HOLE IN THE UNIVERSE.
IT WAS GREAT.
MAROON-STRIPE? WHERE ARE YOU??
DAMMIT SOMEONE ANSWER ME!!!
I AM NOT SHUTTING UP UNTIL YOU DO.

[Don't tempt him, he is more than willing to be the biggest petulant brat in all of the universes until he gets his way.]

[ooc: An opt out post if anyone decides that they really REALLY don't want me to tag them with Caliborn. It won't get better from here folks.]

Comments

[nukeoleptic]

wait seriously??
is this him??

pretend that said jade :v

[tipsygnostalgia]

yeah this is him in all his douchebag glory

i didn't even notice it didnt

[nukeoleptic]

i dont think i like him very much :|

[tipsygnostalgia]

he is literally
the WORST

[nukeoleptic]

bluhhhh

[tipsygnostalgia]

did u know he used to make dirk draw porn for him

[nukeoleptic]

... that is really gross D:

[deudly]

NOT JUST GROSS.
IT WAS.
*RAVENOUSSS*

[dirk drew him great porn fuck you jade.]

[nukeoleptic]

are you serious right now???

[deudly]

YES.
YOU CAN ASK DIRK.
IT WAS SO RAUNCHY.
HEY. JADE DOG.
DO YOU WANT ME TO ASK HIM. TO DRAW YOU IN IT TOO??
I BET YOU WOULD LOOK GREAT. AND DIRTY.

[nukeoleptic]

okay i think i am going to need you to never talk to me again
i think that is really the best possible course of action here

[deudly]

JUST ONE QUESTION.
WHEN I ASK FOR PORN. SHOULD I ASK HIM WITH DOG EARS? OR WITHOUT?

WHOOPS i got distracted and messed up my tags ahah 1/2

[nukeoleptic]

grrrrr T_T

2/2

[nukeoleptic]

....hold on wait a second
is that picture roxy showed down there really the porn dirk drew for you

[deudly]

ONLY ONE PART OF IT.
HE DREW OTHER PICTURES TOO.
ABSOLUTELY. SCANDALOUS. PICTURES.

[nukeoleptic]

oh yes you are right
my ears are burning
that picture is pretty goshdarned scandalous :o

[tipsygnostalgia]

it is SO gross yeah
i set one as phone wallpaper forever ago
i still have it here so i can show you
just feast ur eyes on this raunchy pic of me and your g-pa

[nukeoleptic]

omfg roxy!!!! D:
put a warning on that, would you?? i am at work!

should i start calling you grandma?

[tipsygnostalgia]

ok
#cw: marriage + babyeating jake there u go

you could of before but i divorced hubbyjake a while ago
tho it would be funny if that was a thing and you and featherbro were still a thing
coz then i would b your mom in law and your grandmom how weird would that be

[nukeoleptic]

rofl
that was over a year ago
or
well

jesus
asgard jumping me around the timeline can be seriously headache inducing

[tipsygnostalgia]

its confusin to the max
like i was here for 5 months
then i went home for 5 months
but here it was only for a day
and now ive been here another 2 months??

[deudly]

YOU KEPT IT???
WOW. ROXY. I ALWAYS KNEW. YOU WERE THE NASTY ONE.

[tipsygnostalgia]

of course i kept it
how could i not

[deudly]

TELL ME.
DO YOU LOOK AT IT. LONGINGLY. EVERY NIGHT?
BEFORE YOU GO TO YOUR SARSWAPAGUS.
DO YOU TAKE A GLANCE. AND IMAGINE A WORLD.
WHERE JAKE EATS YOUR BABY?

[tipsygnostalgia]

you are one complete nutter u do know that rite