asgardeventide | third wing Ƹ̴Ӂ̴Ʒ video

[There's a very, very tall man on your video today, Asgard. A man in a bright purple suit, and sunglasses even though there's no sun to be seen, what with the oncoming winter weather.]

Yeah, so I don't do this often, the posting thing, I mean, but I felt like something needed to be said.

[And he holds up his clasped hands, opening them slightly- inside them is a colorless butterfly, flapping it's wings feebly.]

Since it's pretty much a given we are going to be stuck here for a while long, possibly forever because life hates us, I've figured I ought to do something with my time about the insect population, considering winter's coming and all.

That's right, insects. Because at least these things are way more deserving of my help than humans are. So, here's the deal! I'm going to be creating one of those...what are they called, butterfly houses? And you bring me any butterflies or moths you have hanging around your place. Consider it a nice little donation to the cause, alright? And I don't know, I'll do something like not insult you for 24 hours. That's a pretty good deal, take advantage of it.

[A pause as he frowns at the camera.]

However...if you bring me any dead butterflies or moths, I'll seriously punch you in the face. They have to be alive. Don't test me, okay?

...

And if anyone actually knows how to create a butterfly house in the first place, that would be kind of helpful too.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

... Wait, so now you're asking for an all-out house to be built so you could live with them?

[He's not saying it out loud just yet, but it sounded like the beginning of a cheesy fairy tale to him.]

[sob he just likes butterflies too much for his own good.]

Why do you sound like you're going to judge me forever if I say "yes"?

Nonsense! What makes you think that?

[He totally is. Maybe.]

I have a feeling.

[GRUMBLE GRUMBLE BUTTERFLIES ARE COOL GRUMBLE >BI]

Do you have some sort of radar or antenna for these kinds of feelings? I could just be asking innocent questions for all you know.

I've dealt with enough people to tell when they're actually thinking worse of me than I want them to. So no radar or antenna, but I have my instincts.

Ah, so my opinion of you does matter is what I'm hearing? [At this point he is blatantly poking fun at him, sorry Nick.]

I just hope there's enough funds for you to make it through with a project like this, unless you convince someone who can draw something to do it for you.

I like it when people see me more favorably, yes, I admit it, but that doesn't mean I put any value in it whatsoever.

I'll convince them, no worries. I have my ways. [And he smiles a very toothy and not so nice grin at that last part.]

[... He doesn't like that smile, what is with that smile.]

Are these kinds of ways going to get you terribly noticed by that Forensics Unit going around?

[IT IS THE BEST SMILE.]

What? No. Really, who do you think I am? I'm no killer.

Just a bit of bodily harm might do he trick.

[IT IS CREEPY AND HE DOESN'T LIKE IT.]

... That's kind of the same thing.

No. Forensics are only called if somebody is murdered, don't you know your crime terminology?

No, I don't know anything about crime technology, I liked to avoid that if I could. I'll admit to stupidity and ignorance there.

Good.

[He smirks at that.]

But in any case, don't worry your flowery little head about it. I'll get what I need- violence will just have to be the last resort.

[He's half-tempted to throw in another snide remark, but manages to hold back for now. You win this time, Nick!]

Yeah sure, I can't help you much aside from trying to find materials anyway. Unless you need healing for whatever reason.

[AW YEAH.]

Pshhhh, me Healing? Honestly, the last thing I need is that, because I totally won't get myself in danger, I'll make sure of that.

That's what I thought. Besides you would probably have better luck in the hospital if that ever happens and you let others touch you.

...

You really think I'm going to get myself beaten to a bloody pulp, don't you?

You never know, anything can come back to bite a person some day. Not that I'm hoping it will.

[He's actually being honest about that last comment, really.]

Oh, tell me about it. But really, don't worry a thing about me, I've gotten into much worse situations, believe me.

I'll believe it and try not to imagine what those situations are, if that's fine with you. [No nightmare fuel please and thanks.]