asgardeventide | 6. video

[ Backdated a few hours back to the evening of the nineteenth!

Tavros is humming. Just humming. He's already sang on the network once, albeit due to a recording left running before he remembered he'd started one. The singing wasn't really all that bad!

This, however... ]

My chick bad,
My chick hood
My chick do stuff dat ya chick wish she could

My chick bad, badder than yours
My my chick bad, badder than yours
My my my chick bad, badder than yours

[ A pause. ]

Well, it's Friday and it's my day
Just to party all the way to Sunday
Maybe 'til Monday, I dunno what day
Everyday's just a holiday
Crusin' on the freeway
Feelin' kinda breezy
Got the top down, lettin' my hair blow
I dunno where I'm goin'
All I know is when I get there
Someone's gonna "touch my body"

[ He looks terribly confused at that lyric there. ]

Excuse me miss, I don't mean to sound like a jerk
But I'm feelin' just a little stressed out from work
Could you punch me in the stomach and pull my hair?
Spit on me, maybe gouge my eyes out? (Yeah)
Now, what's your name girl?
What's your sign?
Other trolls saying, "Man, you must be up out your mind"
No I'm just, checking out that behind,
Woah!
Beer Goggles! Blind!
I'm just trying to unwind!

Now I'm gonna make you dance
It's your chance
Yeah boy shake that ass
Oops I mean girl girl girl girl
Girl you know you're my world
Alright now lose it
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Just lose it
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Go crazy
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Oh baby
(HA-HA)
Oh baby, baby
(HA-HA)

[ This? This is awful. It's filled with Tavros' trademark pauses, it doesn't match whatever beat he was supposedly going for. There are plenty of uhs and lengthy pauses where it looks like he desperately wants to say something about how none of these lyrics make sense except maybe he thinks the original rapper might be desperately longing for a kismesis but doesn't know how to blackflirt, but whatever magic this is encourages him to continue on with the atrocity rather than indulge in a moment or two of mind numbing stupidity. ]

Uh, [ he blinks, and then his chest swells with what has to be pride and like any good thirteen year old, Tavros declares his challenge. ] The stage has been, uhh, set, Asgard! For the straight up, mother-flipping, sickest fires to, take this town! I, challenge you, to a slam poetry contest, and, winner take all... But, there isn't actually a prize, so, bragging rights, are what you win. But, I, uhh, will, personally schoolfeed, all of you.

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[ I THINK THIS ICON SAYS IT ALL but really Tavros.....w-what was that omgggggg kaz can't handle this. He's going to die laughing ]

[Just have Aika staring awkwardly as she tries to work out where to even start with this.]

That was... [Much too long of a pause.] ... something.

[ IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE HEAT GET OUT OF THE KITCHEN KAZ

or

or at least stop laughing ]

Aika, do you, uhh, accept the challenge?

Slam poetry is, my speciality.

[ Forget all those other jerks. ]

Good job, Tavros! Show them what you've got.

Thanks, Terezi! [ He's so proud ] But, I don't really understand, these stanzas.

I've never heard anything like that before. I wonder if it exists in Japan?

[ NOPE sorry Tavros this is just...too much :'D Kaz's stomach literally hurts from laughing ]

W--wh, what the fuck was that???

What. [ No that's a travesty! ] You should, uhh, try it!

Oh, I don't know... [Some of the things he said, all those things about a girl beating a boy up...]

[ ... ]

No, you should! It's, a lot of fun and, it can be very good to, work through some things, with the use of lyrics. Not that that poem was, a particularly good example, though. I don't understand why, the rapper was so upset about, calling a boy attractive. Or, why he wanted a kismesis, or someone to, uh, touch him.

[ wh ]

[ crying ]

[So many things she could explain, and so many others she doesn't understand - kismesis is another new word. Where does she start?]

It was... kind of suggestive, but in weird ways. I understand some of it, but it's probably not the kind of thing you want to hear.

I'd rather practice it a bit first before I try it over the network, if that's okay. I've never done anything like that before.

[ Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam turpis magna, convallis et malesuada eget, eleifend et massa. Mauris varius risus dolor, eu rhoncus mi. Phasellus vel nisi et elit tempus iaculis eu sed lorem. Vivamus ac enim lectus, sit amet semper dolor. Cras sit amet dui ac nisi condimentum imperdiet. Vestibulum consectetur interdum metus, ut facilisis mi feugiat ac. Vestibulum ligula ipsum, accumsan quis tincidunt in, fermentum quis felis. ]

[ Wait, Wait. Shit--

that actually wasn't so bad. ]

[ WHAT IS HAPPENING--

Dave is just staring at you, Tav.

~~My work here is done.~~ ]

[ Tavros is

actually legitimately wiggling in his seat. What did you think not that he cares but will you accept the challenge come on dave ]

I still, don't really get it, but.. [ no really ]

Oh! Do you want to, meet up to slam?

Well... humans like some strange things when they're... intimate. [Dying here, just dying.] There's no need to go into detail, though. That's all you need to know.

[That's unexpected, and she finally manages to force a smile through her dying.] That sounds like fun. As long as you'll go easy on me.

[Another few seconds of staring.] That was ... interesting music, Tavros. [And suddenly she understands why having this curse around all the time might not be such a good idea.] Maybe I'd better not ask what some of the lyrics meant.

I, uh, I'm not sure slam poetry is something I'll be good at. [She doesn't want to hurt his feelings, though.] Sure, okay. You start.

Edited 2012-05-20 17:05 (UTC)

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