asgardeventide | 001. Video

[Eridan is admiring his new bracelet, twisting and turning it to watch the stone set in the middle shimmer. He pauses, tapping at the center of the stone before addressing the screen, his entire demeanor radiating barely controlled rage and indignation.]

Wwhat the fuck is goin on here? Maybe you havven't heard a me, but, believve me, I am a seriously important troll an you're goin to rue the day you messed with Eridan Ampora. So wwhy don't you just go ahead an showw yourself an stop bein a fuckin cowward.

I don't blame you for hidin though, 'cause once I find wwhoevver is fuckin with me, you're dead.

[Suddenly occuring to him that his words might be more apt than he originally thought, Eridan is uncharacteristically struck silent for a moment. After all, he was dead. Not many trolls, even ones as talented as him, could survive being chainsawed in half. He'd been d-e-a-d dead and, now, well, he was here. Maybe this was some sort of afterlife... He dismisses the idea almost immediately with a visible shake of his head. This is stupid. Magic doesn't exist and these gods don't exist and... Right, getting back to the point. He taps at the bracelet again.]

I mean, at least you “gods” havve an appreciation for the finer things in life, but Eridan Ampora is nobody's toy. Least a all a bunch a shoddy magicians or wwizards or wwhatevver you wanna call yourselvves. Evveryone knows that magic isn't real. So, nice try, but I'm not buyin it. Game's ovver.

[Secure in his victory over whatever charlatans are trying to pull the wool over his eyes, a smirking Eridan shuts off the video feed. Or at least he attempts to but only manages to change the video screen size. He curses, spluttering in frustration as he pushes buttons randomly until the bracelet finally turns off. So much for his attempt at coolkid status.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Oh look. Another troll. Samantha was still getting over being wanged by Gamzee in the back of the head, so seeing yet another of the impossible to understand cretins show up wasn't exactly on her list of 'things to do.']

So there are important trolls now, as opposed to chainsaw wielding gardeners and insane clowns. Right. Where's Aradia when you need her? She made sense.

...

Hate to break it to you, troll boy, but you're stuck here like the rest of us, and Baldr and Loki do like to treat us as toys now and again.

[She wasn't even going to dignify the magic comment with a response. Without her spells, it was little more than hot air anyway.]

Edited 2012-08-12 10:58 (UTC)

A course there are important trolls. An I happen to be one a them. I'm practically royalty, so wwatch your mouth, land dwweller.

--Wwait, Chainsaww wwieldin--... Kan. [Good job. Eridan looks flustered.]

Yeah, keep spouting. You ain't my royalty, and I ain't your subject, so don't expect me to bow and scrape for you. You know Kanaya, do you? I'm going to just assume all you trolls know each other. That's been the only thing I keep finding out one way or another.

So what's your story?

A course you ain't my subject. Like I'd evver deign to be ruler of a group a imbecilic wweaklins. I'm not sure how your species survvivved as long as they did.

An I'm not tellin you anythin about myself. You might knoww Kan, but that doesn't mean I havve to make nice wwith you. Besides, apparently I'vve been here before, so you should just ask the rest a those gossipin wrigglers for all the sordid details.

Oh, you're a lovely, paranoid, egotistical little bastard aren't you? Well, the paranoia I can deal with. And, really, the less we know about each other, the simpler this gets.

I'm sometimes a raving, psychotic bitch. I'd stay the hell away from me if I start flirting with you, troll-boy. But I really only need to know one thing from you...

[Private]

[She hits the private button and her features get a bit of a raised eyebrow, tired and annoyed sort of look to them.]

You aren't going to get in my way when I go to give a certain clown the pummeling he's got coming to him, are you? I've got more than enough blockades right now, and I want to know just how many people need to get beat before I kick a clown's ass.

[Eridan splutters out a reply.]

W-what?! Wwhy wwould I wwant to havve anythin' to do wwith you in the first place? An', that's a bit hypocritical a you, callin' me all those names wwhen you seem to think highly a yourself wwith no proof, either.

Gam might be a disgrace to highbloods evverywwhere, but he's pretty harmless. Or at least he wwas, before the wwhole quittin' sopor cold gobblebeast catastrophe.

I'm not sayin' ya don't havve your reasons for wantin' to stife wwith him or tryin' to stop you. Just curious, wwhat'd he do to you?

I don't think very highly of myself, believe it or not. I'm just dangerous. That's all.

As for what the clown did, that would involve him taking a bat upside the back of my head hard enough that I'm lucky I'm not human so I woke up a half hour later with a splitting headache. Somebody earned himself a black eye in return. Maybe an airhorn to the ear for good measure. I don't want to kill him or anything, just beat some sense into him.

You're not human? And you're dangerous? ...That's interestin'.

[He pauses, laughing softly.]

Beat some sense into Gam? Are wwe talkin' about the same fuckin' troll? Gam and sense havven't evver been acquainted. I'm not sure they can evver exist in the same physical plane a existence.

I love a challenge, what can I say? If he's got no sense, I'm going to have to cram it down his throat, pinch his nose shut and beat him until he swallows it down. And if the first time doesn't work, I'll bloody him until he learns.

Even the stubborn ones can be taught. Given enough time and pressure. Stubbornness, persistence and creativity are the hallmarks of a good teacher.

[Just a little dangerous, yes.]

[Yeaaah... he's beginning to get that. And he's not sure if he's supposed to be terrified or turned on. Maybe a little bit of both.]

Wwell, I'll wwish you luck an' all that. I'm just not sure howw successful this campaign is goin' to be. I mean, Gam's not exactly stubborn--more like... completely unawware a' social niceties and rules.

[Well, being a troll, perhaps both was the appropriate response. After all, wasn't he one of the would-be-playboys, after a fashion?]

I've had disappointments in my life. Plenty of them. I'll deal one way or another. Name's Samantha, by the way. I figure if we're being sociable right now, might as well at least pretend to follow pleasantries.

Pleasantries wwere created for a reason after all. To weed out the common from polite society.

Sam, it's a pleasure.

I'm careful about the whole 'pleasure' thing, but yeah. It's definitely been something, Eridan. You ever want to sit and chat with a duke's brat, or at least what part of my world calls a duke, give me a buzz. Somewhere public, though. I don't exactly have a sterling record with you trolls.

I assure you I'm nothin' like those common vvulgar lowwbloods, but I understand your concerns. If I get bored, I might look you up.

See you around.

001. Video

no subject

[Video]

[Video]

[Video]

[Video] part-private

[Video] private

[Video] private

[Video] private

[Video] private

[Video] private

[Video] private

[Video] private

[Video] private

[Video] private