001 [video]

[womanfromacre]

[It has taken Maria Thorpe a little over a month to work out how to broadcast from her bracelet. It has been an interesting and eventful month to say the least, and while she is by no means accustomed to this strange 'modern' lifestyle, she is at least attempting to adapt.

There are a few stumbling blocks, but with some ingenuity on her part she feels she is well on her way to overcoming them.

Take today for example; she is garbed in modern attire and is sitting in a modestly furnished kitchen by the looks of things, and she opens her mouth to speak.]

Good day to you all. I have been wondering for a while now what I should say on-

[Whatever it is she might have to say is immediately interrupted by a sudden and unmistakable:

BOOM

Something that looks like the charred remains of a kettle goes flying through the air as black smoke belches from the sorry form of the microwave. There's a crash as it hits the wall. Maria has dived beneath the table and blinks in disbelief at the mayhem all around her before she reacts in anger.]

A pox on this god damned blasted hellish-trickery, why must it take so much effort to boil a kettle?!

Comments

[Video]

[foodshortage]

[ Oh, dear.

But he understands the frustration. ]

It is certainly not the easiest life to adapt to.

[ He can... try to help. ]

Have you located the stove?

[Video]

[womanfromacre]

[She's coughing as she makes her way through the smoke to try and open a window.]

I was assured that the wretched thing didn't need to go on a stove yet-

[There's a shrill, obnoxious beeping sound that adds its voice to the chaos and Maria looks distinctly unimpressed.]

What in god's name is that?

[Video]

[foodshortage]

That would be the... fire alarm.

[Video]

[womanfromacre]

Oh hell.

[She's found the window and is attempting to waft some of the smoke out.]

How do I stop it?

[Video]

[foodshortage]

I do believe there should be a button on it.

[Video]

[familyissues]

[ wat. ]

You can't put a kettle in a microwave!

[ And then well, okay- it's a bit redundant to ask since she's obviously fine if she's cursing up a storm, but- ] Are you all right?

[Video]

[womanfromacre]

[Cough cough.]

I am unharmed but the damn warming box isn't and why shouldn't I put the kettle in there? It is supposed to heat things and lord only knows the damned kettle wasn't boiling any water.

[Video]

[familyissues]

You can't put metal things into microwaves, Maria, it's a fire hazard.

[ ... that smoke looks worrying on the screen. ]

Where are you? It looks like you could use a hand.

[Video]

[womanfromacre]

That sounds absurd. Metal is supposed to get hot, not catch fire.

[Cough.]

I am at home, and if you would happen to have some advice I would most certainly welcome it.

[Video]

[2cool4guardian]

[Brb, laughing his ass off.]

Did you just really make a kettle explode? Awesome.

[Video]

[womanfromacre]

Well I am glad someone finds it amusing for I most assuredly do not.

[Video]

[2cool4guardian]

You're welcome. [Yeah, he can be a little shit, sorry.] But if you really want to stop it, you could start by unplugging the microwave, you know.

[Video]

[womanfromacre]

[...plug?]

There is nothing plugging the thing that I can see. Is that why it acted this way?

[Video]

[true_renaissance_man]

[AHHH an explosion!? It does not take too long to discover what happened what with the smoke billowing from the microwave and all...]

Impressive! You actually build a steam bomb from a kettle! Genio!

[What that was not what you were going for?]

When you get a new machine...

[Cause that microwave looks dead.]

You should try putting in a lump of tin foil or even a marshmallow! I highly recommend the marshmallow, the reaction is very surprising and you can eat it afterwards!

[Video]

[womanfromacre]

I can assure you I did not intend to build any sort of bomb, sir-

[Oh but wait, that's a familiar voice isn't it? She squints a bit because everything's just a little bit smoky right now.]

Pardon me if I am mistaken, might you be Master da Vinci?

[Video]

[true_renaissance_man]

Then it was an accidental invention? That is no less wonderful, but next time maybe you should open a window first or try your experiments outside?

[It was very smokey in there and... testing a bomb indoors was dangerous. Yes, yes, accidental invention. She might not have realized all of this would happen. ]

Si, I am.

[He confirmed her guess before chuckling and adding. ]

And you are the lady who did not order a piece for a wagon,
Signora Maria?

[Video]

[womanfromacre]

That's me. And I can assure you this particular discovery was completely accidental, Master da Vinci. I was trying to make tea, not some sort of weapon.

[She appears to be surveying the carnage with a look of dismay.]

Though I fear I will not be having any for a while after this.

video;

[verybigpheasants]

Because, very occasionally, I would imagine the gods enjoy seeing some of us struggle. Terribly inconvenient, isn't it?

Re: video;

[womanfromacre]

'Inconvenient' is certainly one word for it, though I would prefer to call it a pain in the arse.

video;

[verybigpheasants]

[ He chuckles. ] Your way of putting it is much better. There's a fair stretch of adjustment in coming to this city, with the technology.

[ And "technology," he says with a certain 'not the kind of word I ever actually use' air. ]

video;

[womanfromacre]

I am not sure whether this 'technology' is here to hinder or help us. Some of it is not so bad but a lot of what I have been exposed to has been nothing but a headache.

video

[highstakesgame]

I should think teatime with you would be entertaining, at a bare minimum!

video

[womanfromacre]

It's funny what some people find entertaining around these parts.

[highstakesgame]

I'd say it's more of a commentary on the level of entertainment here.

[womanfromacre]

I have not found much to draw amusement from, that is for sure.