asgardeventide | The Magic Left Behind

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The Magic Left Behind

[Action; Private]

[When she had opened up the list of other Travelers, she did a double-take. Many of the names she had grown so familiar with were... no longer there? She reads through it several times to confirm, mentally going through the alphabet to make sure there's no mistake.

Eventually, she closes the list, letting her hands drop helplessly into her lap. So many people had come and gone since she first came here. She hadn't known all of them, no. But it still hurt to see them leave, especially when among them were those she knew so well.

As with every other time she had made this discovery, the tears begin to well in her eyes. She knows Hisao will be by soon for their daily run, but suddenly, she doesn't particularly feel up to it. It doesn't help that she's crying now, and who even knows when she'll be able to stop.

Quietly, she climbs back into her bed, burying her face in her pillow. It's too sad. Too sad, and in a way... scary. She's been here almost from the beginning, and she hasn't returned home a single time. What if she stays here forever, while everybody else leaves? She'll be alone again, and she won't even get to see Shi-chan or her Master, and...

The thought only makes her cry even harder.]

[Audio]

[The voice that comes over the feed is soft, but if you've spoken to her enough, it is unmistakably Hibiki's. Considering she doesn't usually do voice posts, this is a little... odd.]

Does anybody... know what to do when you really, really miss somebody?

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[sophie remembers hibiki's voice, the eager-to-please little girl who had bought conan sweets. she sounds less happy and eager now]

You do, for a bit, but then you do other things. Missing people...we just do, hm? But the people we miss, they probably wouldn't want us to be unhappy.

[There's a wet sniffle.]

...I know they wouldn't want me to, but...

...I can't help it. It's... lonely.

[the sound of a child's voice--a young girl, at that--asking such a question hits her squarely in the longing for her own daughter, knowing of the fate that was given to her.

her voice is just as soft, taking on a tone of quiet encouragement colored with a pained knowing]

That is a hard question, isn't it? It's hard to think about the people left behind... but you know, while it hurts to miss them, if a person thinks well of them and hopes for the best for them, it can be a bit easier. Even moreso when sharing those feelings with others.

[Excuse her for a moment as she sniffles - she's still a little watery, but this is still much better than she was earlier.]

When... sh-sharing?

[Ilya was never the type to cry often, but now the thought of how lonely she must be in that castle crosses her mind...

it makes her want to comfort this child even more, to brush the tears away and make things better]

Mm. Many, many people miss those they care about. You've probably met some of them here, right? And sharing that experience... it's okay that it hurts because the other person will understand. You wouldn't be alone anymore and neither would the other person and that might help ease that pain for you both, wouldn't it?

[Hisao was, indeed, due to show up. He'd also seen how many people's names had left the network of late and he'd been close with a few of them too. However, he hadn't yet seen Hibiki's message.

He knocked softly on the door.]

Good morning?

[He himself finds himself battling with that very same question on a daily basis. The list of people he misses seems to grow longer and longer by the day, but returning to find Raven gone has truly been a blow to him.]

Perhaps talking of the people you miss will help ease your pain?

There's not really much to do. You'll always miss people in your life.

Distracting yourself can help. With time, the feeling starts to fade, bit by bit.

It can be. But you have people who are here, too, don't you?

[A shaky breath, and then a soft sigh.]

I... I guess so. But it isn't the same.

Would you really want it to be?

[Maternal isn't exactly a word she knows, partially because she's so young, and partially because it's not a trait most people who speak with her generally exhibit. It was arguable that her Master was the closest thing she had to a father, but... she didn't really consider herself as having a mother, either here or at home.

So having such a voice there, even if it's a stranger, that's so comforting? Is definitely helping her right now, more than she necessarily realizes.]

Then... I just h-have to find somebody else who misses people too, and... t-talk to them about it?

[It sounds so simple... That's really all there is to it?]

[He is greeted with silence.

Well, no, not entirely. If he listens closely, he might hear the sound of muffled sobbing.]

That wouldn't... b-bother others?

[Even like this, she doesn't want to bug people about her sobbing.]

You mean like... forgetting?

[She doesn't like the sound of that, either...]

It would be a start, wouldn't it?

And, truthfully, you're already speaking to someone like that. So I'd be more than glad to listen if it might help.

[she's not completely certain she is right in this sentiment and yet, if Kiritsugu had not been there when she finally gotten news of what had happened after she had died... if there had not been other people to talk to when she first arrived, how lonely and hurt she would have been]

[She shakes her head at first, only to realize Sophie would not be able to see that.]

No... I don't want to just... just replace them. I couldn't ever do that.

Oh...

[She feels bad, knowing that this kind lady (and yes, she is convinced of that much already) also has people she loves and misses. But then, that must apply to everyone here in one way or another, mustn't it?]

...

There were a lot of friends I made here, but... they keep leaving. And I know I should be happy, because then they get to go home, but...

[Her voice becomes muffled as she curls up, her chin tucked behind her arms.]

...I still miss them. And then I just start missing my home, too.

[And listen closely for a moment he does to see if he can hear sounds of her stirring. If he didn't hear anything, he'd assume she was still asleep and go running alone.

However, upon hearing the gentle noise of her sobs, he knocks again.]

Hibiki? Um... are you alright in there? Do you need help?

Oh, but missing them is okay. No one is going to say you shouldn't miss them.

[her tone is earnest, quick to be supportive after listening to the girl's admission. After, her voice quietens a bit and it's clear that she's also thinking of sadder things herself]

For me... even if I were to be sent away from this place, I wouldn't be able to go back home. So I plan to stay here as long as possible. At least here I can do my best to supoort those who do go home or were left home, right?

Would that sort of idea help, do you think?

Edited 2013-03-19 04:02 (UTC)

Y-you can't go home?

[Her voice breaks there for a moment in a combination of both surprise and sorrow. She can't imagine what it must be like to be unable to go home and see all of the people you had to leave behind when coming here.]

...You'll do all of that, even though it's hard? [Because it must be hard. She has no illusions of that.]

[The sobs pause for a moment in her surprise - did he hear her through the door?

...

She doesn't like the idea of him seeing her like this yet again, but she knows that will just worry him even more. It takes a bit, but she does eventually shuffle her way over to the door and open it up, trying to brush her tears away with the back of her arm.]

S-sorry, I... don't think I can run today...

[He gets the feeling he knows exactly why she is asking this. Out of everyone he knew Hibiki is the fragile in a lot of ways. He wasn't sure how to answer her at first but it takes him a moment to remember.]

You keep your memories of them close to your heart, no matter how painful it is sometimes.

[she has long been used to the idea of never being able to see her loved ones again, but of course it is something that hurts even now. still, like always before, she would rather give hope to others than dwell on inevitabilities and so her tone stays even and may even try to lighten]

Mm... there was a war back home. Things did not end so well.

And it is hard. It always will be, maybe. But even with the losses, just that small time with those people can always be something to look back to. That is more than I could have ever hoped for.

[ Oh, Gwaine's... usual brand of advice is completely useless in situations like these. For the best, probably. ]

Ahh. I expect that depends on what you want done about it.

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The Magic Left Behind

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