video; day 434

[myownhero]

So, um. This is weird.

[Deep thoughts. And things everyone most likely knows by now. That's not why she's here, broadcasting herself to the city, but she can't quite keep it from leaving the tip of her tongue.]

I'm Bliss. I'm from Texas. I'm a senior in High School, I do beauty pageants for my mom, I do Roller Derby behind her back - there's this guy I really like, and I'm pretty sure he likes me too - boring, right? I'm really, really boring. I hear about wars on the news, and I see the soldiers around when they're on leave, but... I really think I was the wrong choice here.

[She glances down at her hands, running the pad of her thumb over the opposite thumbnail. This is coming out all wrong.]

Not like I don't wanna help. I do. Apparently I'm also really strong here, so there's probably something I can do. I'm just a bit - [Scared.] - lost, I guess. Other than helping with all the flood damage, I dunno where to start? I guess that's what I'm trying to say. But meeting people's as good a start as any, so - hi.

[With a nervous, fluttery laugh, she leaves her broadcast at that. Not a great first impression, but not a disaster either.]

Comments

[Video]

[5thchild]

What are beauty pageants and Roller Derby?

[ ah but- ] Is loving someone really that boring?

[Video] 1/2

[myownhero]

[She just looks at him for a second, because - well, there aren't many fashion statements that faze her after getting into Roller Derby, but red coloured contacts and grey-dyed hair are kind of an odd combination.

After a moment, though, she decides it's pretty cool. He could be in a band or something, like Oliver.]

Beauty pageants are my mom's life. [It's said wearily, but not as much as it would've been before she was suddenly taken from her family. There's a new wistfulness there.] Basically, a bunch of girls put on fancy dresses and makeup and try to sound smart - but not too smart, you've still gotta be wholesome, and too smart isn't feminine - and whoever does the best gets a trophy. That's as exciting as it gets in Bodeen, anyway.

Roller Derby, it's - kind of complicated, and you probably didn't want all the rules, right? Basically it's roller skating around an oval track and trying to get through the other team's players before they knock you out, or trying to knock them out. There's a lot of thrown elbows and hip checks, it gets rough. It's the best, though.

[Video] 2/2

[myownhero]

[And holy crap, where did that come from?!]

I - I'm not in love with him! We just had our first date. But... yeah, it's pretty standard for teenage girls. Everyone's either dating someone or wants to be, or wants to be dating someone other than who they're with. Basic girl drama.

[Video] 1/2

[5thchild]

Smart isn't feminine? [ he blinks ] Some of the brightest people I have met are females, though.

[ AND the roller Derby. yeah he- ] Oh. [ has no idea what roller skating is. he is sorry about that! But still ] I'm glad you have something more exciting to do, however.

[Video] 2/2

[5thchild]

[ AND IT CAME FROM KAWORU. which is basically what he asks other people ]

I do wonder if others don't go through the same, ether they are girls or not.

[Video]

[myownhero]

Some of the smartest people out there are women, period. Just don't say that too loudly in Texas. We're pretty old-fashioned, especially the pageant group.

[She shrugs, having to give him that point.]

Yeah, sure, everyone does. It's just - really intense and practically a sport of its own in high school.

[Video]

[5thchild]

What would happen if they knew? [ someone smart is a bad thing? it's a strange place, texas. ]

I see. perhaps you will have the chance to do it here, as well. When things have calmed down.

[Video]

[myownhero]

[It's a tough question - she doesn't know if he means if they were told or if they really knew, deep down.]

Some people - just know the wrong thing. And they don't want to know anything else, because it's what they're comfortable with. I guess.

[Video]

[5thchild]

It's their comfort level. To see beyond it makes them feel threatened and thus they reject it. Even if they cannot deny it forever.

[Video]

[myownhero]

Yeah. Basically, the people where I live are really comfortable, so there wouldn't be much point in trying to explain anything to them.

[Video]

[5thchild]

Would you want to explain it to them? Take them off their comfort zone?

[Video]

[myownhero]

[It's worth asking, since he seems a bit - detached from things like expressions:]

Have you ever heard the saying "Beating your head against a brick wall?"

[Video]

[5thchild]

No, I haven't.

Why would you want to do that?

[Video]

[myownhero]

It's a metaphor. For something useless. You're not breaking down a brick wall with your head, and you're not breaking down Bodeen's attitudes with one teenage girl's opinions.

[Video]

[5thchild]

But you can break it down with something else, specially if you have help.

[ ok, maybe he only got half of the metaphor right BUT HEY, the help part is true ]

[Video]

[myownhero]

The feminism ball really got rolling almost six decades ago, more than a century if you count the suffragettes, and it still hasn't mowed down Bodeen. I think it's past hope at this point. [She grins.] I'd rather just climb over the wall and get out.

[Video]

[5thchild]

[ oh, he heard a bit about feminism, before ]

But the wall is still there, for others to come. It has to be teared down, eventually.

[Video]

[myownhero]

Yeah, it does. And who knows? [She shrugs, letting out a little chuckle.] Maybe after I've been part of saving the whole universe, I'll be more of a revolutionary.

[Video]

[5thchild]

it'll show you you can be, at least. However, you'll forget this place.

[Video]

[myownhero]

I doubt I'm ever gonna forget this. [She laughs, totally mistaking his meaning.]

[Video]

[5thchild]

I'm sorry.

You will.

[Video]

[myownhero]

Wait... you mean like a mind wipe? Forced amnesia?

[Video]

[5thchild]

[ a soft nod ]

it's a way to put it.

[Video]

[myownhero]

That - is crap. We get to save every world that exists and we can't even remember it? I wouldn't brag if they didn't want me to, I could stay quiet, but...

[Her tone shifts from snippy to something deeper, more sincerely sad.]

... I'd like to remember it. Doing something that important.

[Video]

[5thchild]

I know. Many feel the same, due to the memories they made. However, it's not a possibility, we are meant to forget and meant to keep going as we do.

But at least, by being here, you eventually come to see what you can become. The things you may feel.