[As soon as she says it she feels better, but then it's immediately replaced with regret. Crap.]
No! I mean... I'm sorry. I shouldn't...
[She takes a breath, trying to not backtrack, but at least not make it sound so bad.]
I know it's hard to be around me and that everyone just wants me to be safe, but I was doing okay before I had everyone around me worried. In fact, the thing I worried about more than a seizure was what would happen if I had one -- surrounded by all of you. [She makes a sound, it's apologetic.]
Not... not you or [There's an exhale.] I hear them laughing. I see the looks. That's the hard part and here -- I don't have that. And it's great that you guys hang out with me, but if you're doing it to make sure I don't have a seizure. If you're doing it out of some guilt or because you think you owe it to me because I showed up here still with my issues -- save yourself the stress and just stop.
audio || private
No! I mean... I'm sorry. I shouldn't...
[She takes a breath, trying to not backtrack, but at least not make it sound so bad.]
I know it's hard to be around me and that everyone just wants me to be safe, but I was doing okay before I had everyone around me worried. In fact, the thing I worried about more than a seizure was what would happen if I had one -- surrounded by all of you. [She makes a sound, it's apologetic.]
Not... not you or [There's an exhale.] I hear them laughing. I see the looks. That's the hard part and here -- I don't have that. And it's great that you guys hang out with me, but if you're doing it to make sure I don't have a seizure. If you're doing it out of some guilt or because you think you owe it to me because I showed up here still with my issues -- save yourself the stress and just stop.