asgardeventide | 002 || voice

Entry tags:

002 || voice

[The voice that comes on is light and cheerful and opens with a laugh.]

Hey hey- quick question guys. So I've talked to a few people over the past couple weeks, and I'm getting the idea that a lot of you aren't too keen on the whole 'murdering your fellow man' thing. Which totally surprises me, since I thought we were pulled here to murder things! Or fight a war, I guess.

So this is a little informal poll!

Uh- how many of you have killed someone before? Of your own species, or close enough! Cold blood, warm blood, lots of blood- method or reason don't really matter.

If you want to give details, that'd be awesome.

--I guess I should start, though, huh? I've killed loads of people. Like a lot! [More laughter.] Buuut my world's had at least two wars just in my lifetime, so there's never been any shortage of targets, nya ha ha!

Okay, your turn!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

hahaha yeah ok
though i can guarantee impalements not all its cracked up to be
but i figure a lot of the resident psychopaths are laying low even if its kind of moot when they usually end up in hel
i doubt most of them are qualified to fight a war anyway

But there's so many options! Swords! Spears! Arrows! Maybe a really sharp fence! It's hard to know what to hope for.

Nya ha ha! I've noticed Hel's reputation! But yeah. Just having a thing for killing doesn't make an army. I bet a lot of people are too individualistic. Hate orders. I don't mind 'em at all, at least if those orders are "slaughter all those guys".

a fence
seriously
if you gotta go down at least make a badass showing of it

That's totally the plan! But what if it was a really impressive fence, full of skulls and spikes, and maybe I drag my opponent down onto it too. AND the only way to kill him involves ol' Henry getting a body full of gut-rending spikes and an exceptionally gory demise.

I dunno, I think that could work.

i thought you said you didnt like pain
but yeah maybe
depends who the opponent is
since its pretty dumb if youre wasting it all on a grunt
gotta establish some standards for your grandiose vision of gory demise

Still don't like it, yep. But I also don't feel much! It takes a while for horrible mutilations to get unpleasant~

And oh, sure. If it's just some random farmer with a spear, it'd be a bit of a letdown. Do you have any wicked cool deaths in mind? Everyone's gotta have a dream!

nah
i dont think anythings gonna beat death by meteor or omnipotent dbag
and i survived both of those
so when i go its probably gonna be lame as hell
like way lamer than dying of old age
the geriatric populations got it easy knowing whats coming for them and where it stands on the scale of wicked cool

Wooow- yeah I guess a lot of things would be sort of 'meh' after that!

But you can't give up hope yet! There's gotta be some undiscovered death out there that tops getting not-smushed by meteors.

Though old age is pretty terrible too! Just imagine, your entire body rotting in slow motion, strength ebbing away before your eyes! Losing total control of your body, and being entirely at the mercy of your 'caretakers'. Dying in slow, miserable motion!

If nothing else, at least there's that to look forward to!

jesus you always know just what to say dont you
is there even a way you wouldnt want to die
pain notwithstanding
or are you chill with anything
i mean obviously the gorier the better but thats kinda vague

Nya ha ha! Thanks!

And that's a tricky one! I guess dying in my sleep with no warning or buildup wouldn't be that great. No chance for awesome last words or showers of blood, just... nothing.

I guess that would sort of suck.

yeah it doesnt really sound like it suits
for you i mean
though youd probably be dreaming up some kind of elaborate brutal conquest to make up for it

Aww, I hope so! I mean in dreams, you can get dismembered for HOURS without it hurting or dying right away. Dreams are amazing like that, huh?

man
you werent here when everyone had those bullshit nightmares were you
christ you would have been all over that shit
literally the only way you could wake up from some of those fuckers was by dying

Nightmares? Like you could actually walk around in other people's heads? Awww, that would've been the BEST! I bet I could've gotten so many ideas from that! ...But wait, does that mean people could've gotten into my mind too? And learned all my weird little secrets? Maaaybe it's for the best I missed out after all, nya ha!

But hey, how does something like that even happen?

what does a guy like you even consider weird little secrets
and i guess one of the gods got pissed and threw a tantrum
so the fallout meant people kept passing out all over the fucking place and having grotesque nightmares
it was kind of dumb

[Quiiietly bypassing any mention of his own issues.]

I heard someone mention it once, but I didn't get the details... but people were just having nightmares all over the place? Anyone get an arm or two crushed by napping in the wrong spot?

What was the worst thing you saw? I love getting new ideas!

[Davesprite finds that genuinely weird—which is impressive, because Henry is already super weird—but whatevs. It's cool.]

someone mightve drowned from all the rain
though i dont think that actually happened it just sounds more plausible than the arm crushing to be honest
but i dont know
i saw a rotting zombie troll girl that was kind of fucked up
actually most of the trolls are fucked up and thats even outside of the dreams

Do you know you sort of bloat up if you leave a dead body in the water for too long? It's really gross, and the smell sticks to you like nothing else!

But hey, rotting zombie girls sound pretty great too! Were there bugs? Did you get any on you? Flies are fun to watch, once they've reached the wiggling around stage.

And trolls are the ones with the grey skin and the cute horns, right? They're nice! Even if a little hard to interpret sometimes.

doesnt your skin get all discolored and start to peel funny too
dont think i saw any bugs though no
oh wait
there were spiders
getting their creep on through troll girls torso and webbing on everything in range
also she stank like the skanky unbathed asshole of trailer park cerulean trash
but that might be normal for trolls
the gray skin and idiotic horns could be early signs of rot

It totally does! The texture's really weird if you touch it, too.

And she was full of spiders? That's so cool! I hope whenever I die, I end up full of spiders too. And maggots! Bugs can share space, right?

depends
is it a good thing or a bad thing if the spiders eat the maggots

That's a tricky one!

I guess it ends up being good. Spiders have to eat something!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

002 || voice

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered;

filtered; god i'm sorry for how slow i've been

filtered; it's all good <3